I’ve isolatedmyself whenthings weregettingemotionallydifficultI’ve foundmyselfrepeating thesame cycleeven when Iwanted outI’ve feltemotionallynumb at timesand didn’tunderstand whyThere areemotions I’velearned to shutdown insteadof feelingI’ve struggledto be fullyhonest aboutthe depth ofmy useI’ve felt guiltabout thingsI don’t fullytalk aboutI’ve felt like Ididn’t fullyrecognizemyself at timesin my lifeI’ve hadmomentswhere Iquestioned myability to stay inrecoveryI’ve usedwhen I feltemotionallyoverwhelmedI’ve pushedaway supportwhen I feltoverwhelmedI’ve used tochange howI felt aboutmyself in themomentI’ve carriedshame aboutmy past thatI don’t easilytalk aboutI’ve feltdisconnectedfrom who I usedto be beforeeverythingchangedI’ve felt like partof me is stilltrying to figureout how tomove forwardI’ve used toshut offthoughts ormemories thatfeltoverwhelmingI’ve felt like Iwas survivinglife ratherthan actuallyliving itI’ve felt aloneeven whenpeople werephysicallyaround meI’ve avoidedbeing fullyhonest abouthow badthings gotI’ve hadmomentswhere I didn’tlike who I wasbecomingI’ve feltemotionallyalone evenwhen I hadpeople aroundmeI’ve felt like Iwas repeatinga cycle Icouldn’t breakI’ve avoidedthinking aboutparts of mypast because ithurts too muchI’ve hadthoughts aboutusing that Ididn’t sharewith anyoneI’ve feltshame aboutwho Ibecamewhile usingI’ve used toescape feelingsthat felt toooverwhelmingto sit withI’ve felt guiltabout thingsI’ve donewhile tryingto copeI’ve usedeven when apart of meknew I didn’treally want toI’ve usedeven whenpart of medidn’t wanttoI’ve carriedthings from mypast that stillaffect how Ithink or feeltodayI’ve avoidedmemoriesbecause theystill carryemotionalweightI’ve felt like Iwas stuck insurvival modeinstead ofactually livingI’ve judgedmyselfharshly formy pastchoicesI’ve wantedhelp at timesbut didn’t feelready or ableto ask for itI’ve struggledwith believingI can actuallychangeI’ve hadmomentswhere I didn’tfeel likemyself at allI’ve isolatedmyself whenthingsstartedgetting hardI’vestruggled toask for helpeven when Ineeded itI’ve minimizedmy situationjust to make itfeel moremanageableI’ve usedsubstances toescapeemotional pain Ididn’t knowhow to sit withI’ve ignoredearly warningsigns inmyself beforerelapseI’ve hadmomentswhere I feltcompletelydisconnectedfrom myselfI’ve used whenI wasemotionallyoverwhelmedand didn’t knowwhat else to doI’ve missedearly warningsigns in myselfbefore thingsgot worseI’ve felt regretsoon afterusing but stillstruggled tostop the patternI’ve feltregretimmediatelyafter usingI’ve hademotions Ididn’t knowhow to copewith, so I shutdown insteadI’ve minimizedthe impact ofmy use whentalking aboutitI’ve pulledaway frompeople whowere trying tosupport meI’ve used tofeel “normal”or okay for ashort timeI’ve isolatedmyself whenthings weregettingemotionallydifficultI’ve foundmyselfrepeating thesame cycleeven when Iwanted outI’ve feltemotionallynumb at timesand didn’tunderstand whyThere areemotions I’velearned to shutdown insteadof feelingI’ve struggledto be fullyhonest aboutthe depth ofmy useI’ve felt guiltabout thingsI don’t fullytalk aboutI’ve felt like Ididn’t fullyrecognizemyself at timesin my lifeI’ve hadmomentswhere Iquestioned myability to stay inrecoveryI’ve usedwhen I feltemotionallyoverwhelmedI’ve pushedaway supportwhen I feltoverwhelmedI’ve used tochange howI felt aboutmyself in themomentI’ve carriedshame aboutmy past thatI don’t easilytalk aboutI’ve feltdisconnectedfrom who I usedto be beforeeverythingchangedI’ve felt like partof me is stilltrying to figureout how tomove forwardI’ve used toshut offthoughts ormemories thatfeltoverwhelmingI’ve felt like Iwas survivinglife ratherthan actuallyliving itI’ve felt aloneeven whenpeople werephysicallyaround meI’ve avoidedbeing fullyhonest abouthow badthings gotI’ve hadmomentswhere I didn’tlike who I wasbecomingI’ve feltemotionallyalone evenwhen I hadpeople aroundmeI’ve felt like Iwas repeatinga cycle Icouldn’t breakI’ve avoidedthinking aboutparts of mypast because ithurts too muchI’ve hadthoughts aboutusing that Ididn’t sharewith anyoneI’ve feltshame aboutwho Ibecamewhile usingI’ve used toescape feelingsthat felt toooverwhelmingto sit withI’ve felt guiltabout thingsI’ve donewhile tryingto copeI’ve usedeven when apart of meknew I didn’treally want toI’ve usedeven whenpart of medidn’t wanttoI’ve carriedthings from mypast that stillaffect how Ithink or feeltodayI’ve avoidedmemoriesbecause theystill carryemotionalweightI’ve felt like Iwas stuck insurvival modeinstead ofactually livingI’ve judgedmyselfharshly formy pastchoicesI’ve wantedhelp at timesbut didn’t feelready or ableto ask for itI’ve struggledwith believingI can actuallychangeI’ve hadmomentswhere I didn’tfeel likemyself at allI’ve isolatedmyself whenthingsstartedgetting hardI’vestruggled toask for helpeven when Ineeded itI’ve minimizedmy situationjust to make itfeel moremanageableI’ve usedsubstances toescapeemotional pain Ididn’t knowhow to sit withI’ve ignoredearly warningsigns inmyself beforerelapseI’ve hadmomentswhere I feltcompletelydisconnectedfrom myselfI’ve used whenI wasemotionallyoverwhelmedand didn’t knowwhat else to doI’ve missedearly warningsigns in myselfbefore thingsgot worseI’ve felt regretsoon afterusing but stillstruggled tostop the patternI’ve feltregretimmediatelyafter usingI’ve hademotions Ididn’t knowhow to copewith, so I shutdown insteadI’ve minimizedthe impact ofmy use whentalking aboutitI’ve pulledaway frompeople whowere trying tosupport meI’ve used tofeel “normal”or okay for ashort time

Substance Use - Call List

(Print) Use this randomly generated list as your call list when playing the game. Place some kind of mark (like an X, a checkmark, a dot, tally mark, etc) on each cell as you announce it, to keep track. You can also cut out each item, place them in a bag and pull words from the bag.


1
N
2
O
3
I
4
B
5
O
6
G
7
G
8
B
9
G
10
N
11
I
12
B
13
N
14
O
15
I
16
N
17
B
18
G
19
O
20
N
21
O
22
B
23
G
24
B
25
I
26
B
27
I
28
I
29
G
30
O
31
I
32
I
33
O
34
O
35
G
36
N
37
N
38
I
39
B
40
N
41
B
42
G
43
N
44
I
45
O
46
B
47
G
48
G
49
O
  1. N-I’ve isolated myself when things were getting emotionally difficult
  2. O-I’ve found myself repeating the same cycle even when I wanted out
  3. I-I’ve felt emotionally numb at times and didn’t understand why
  4. B-There are emotions I’ve learned to shut down instead of feeling
  5. O-I’ve struggled to be fully honest about the depth of my use
  6. G-I’ve felt guilt about things I don’t fully talk about
  7. G-I’ve felt like I didn’t fully recognize myself at times in my life
  8. B-I’ve had moments where I questioned my ability to stay in recovery
  9. G-I’ve used when I felt emotionally overwhelmed
  10. N-I’ve pushed away support when I felt overwhelmed
  11. I-I’ve used to change how I felt about myself in the moment
  12. B-I’ve carried shame about my past that I don’t easily talk about
  13. N-I’ve felt disconnected from who I used to be before everything changed
  14. O-I’ve felt like part of me is still trying to figure out how to move forward
  15. I-I’ve used to shut off thoughts or memories that felt overwhelming
  16. N-I’ve felt like I was surviving life rather than actually living it
  17. B-I’ve felt alone even when people were physically around me
  18. G-I’ve avoided being fully honest about how bad things got
  19. O-I’ve had moments where I didn’t like who I was becoming
  20. N-I’ve felt emotionally alone even when I had people around me
  21. O-I’ve felt like I was repeating a cycle I couldn’t break
  22. B-I’ve avoided thinking about parts of my past because it hurts too much
  23. G-I’ve had thoughts about using that I didn’t share with anyone
  24. B-I’ve felt shame about who I became while using
  25. I-I’ve used to escape feelings that felt too overwhelming to sit with
  26. B-I’ve felt guilt about things I’ve done while trying to cope
  27. I-I’ve used even when a part of me knew I didn’t really want to
  28. I-I’ve used even when part of me didn’t want to
  29. G-I’ve carried things from my past that still affect how I think or feel today
  30. O-I’ve avoided memories because they still carry emotional weight
  31. I-I’ve felt like I was stuck in survival mode instead of actually living
  32. I-I’ve judged myself harshly for my past choices
  33. O-I’ve wanted help at times but didn’t feel ready or able to ask for it
  34. O-I’ve struggled with believing I can actually change
  35. G-I’ve had moments where I didn’t feel like myself at all
  36. N-I’ve isolated myself when things started getting hard
  37. N-I’ve struggled to ask for help even when I needed it
  38. I-I’ve minimized my situation just to make it feel more manageable
  39. B-I’ve used substances to escape emotional pain I didn’t know how to sit with
  40. N-I’ve ignored early warning signs in myself before relapse
  41. B-I’ve had moments where I felt completely disconnected from myself
  42. G-I’ve used when I was emotionally overwhelmed and didn’t know what else to do
  43. N-I’ve missed early warning signs in myself before things got worse
  44. I-I’ve felt regret soon after using but still struggled to stop the pattern
  45. O-I’ve felt regret immediately after using
  46. B-I’ve had emotions I didn’t know how to cope with, so I shut down instead
  47. G-I’ve minimized the impact of my use when talking about it
  48. G-I’ve pulled away from people who were trying to support me
  49. O-I’ve used to feel “normal” or okay for a short time