Project Triangle Strategy becomes Triangle Strategy Otterbox releases a new console Fire Emblem Awakening remake New Wario Game Switch Virtual Console is revamped Gex Night N64 added to NSO Nintendo Labo comes back for some reason Upgraded Switch releases 2022 Monolith Soft’s new IP is shown No Bayonetta 3 news Beyond Good and Evil 2 is shown Forspoken is shown Minor/Other Publishers Halo Infinite is shown Persona 5 Racing is announced Next Gen consoles are teased Mega Man Legends Legacy Collection is announced Fallout 5 is announced “No Lootboxes” Tales of Arise is shown Kingdom Hearts anything Another attempt at an Avengers game Animal Crossing amiibo Festival is ported Mario Kart 9 is announced New 3D Kirby Metroid Prime Trilogy is announced for Switch GTA 6 is teased. inactive pops off Half-Life 3 is shown GameBoy is added to NSO Tomb Raider celebrates its anniversary Crash Bandicoot anything That Bethesda “Wooooo” guy comes back Microsoft crossover fighting game is announced Golden Sun isn’t dead Nintendo releases another “99” game Nintendo’s last announcement is disappointing Life is Strange is show Ninja New Kirby spinoff New 2D Kirby Alien Hominid Invasion is shown GTA 5 shows up again Metroid Prime 4 is given a gameplay trailer Splatoon 3 is shown Halo Infinite is delayed Phil Spencer is very proud of his console specs Melee on Switch, but only in a limited release window Project Triangle Strategy gets a good name A presenter leaves a Zoom filter on SMTV is shown Fire Emblem: Genealogy of the Holy War remake Monster Hunter Rise is shown Silksong makes an Appearance anyway Microsoft/Bethesda Bethesda turns a beloved IP into a shitty mobile game Fortnite 2 is announced Pokémon BDSP release date is announced Upgraded Switch releases 2021 Dragon Age 4 is shown Xbox “exclusive” releases on PC Any Halo game comes to Switch Unqualified children present something Crash Bandicoot in Smash Animal Crossing New Horizons is shown Alan Wake 2 is shown New Silent Hill game VirtualBoy is added to NSO Shovel Knight anything Nintendo says they’re “improving online” Switch Calculator gets DLC Assassin’s Creed anything Baten Kaitos anything A new 2D Sonic the Hedgehog game is announced Fallout 76 makes an appearance Dark Souls anything Psychonauts 2 is shown Switch gets a browser Gotham Knights is shown More Zelda ports are announced Virtual Reality anything New 3D Donkey Kong Mother 3 gets remade, but only in Japan Ubisoft has another orchestra no-one cares about Microsoft acquires someone Sonic 2022 is shown Reggie shows up A new Mega Man game (not a collection) is announced General/Meta Final Fantasy 14 is shown Forza is shown Square Enix wins again Mother series gets a trilogy remake We get the yearly montage of how great Bethesda is A presenter forgets they’re not muted, gets cancelled Metroid Prime 4 is teased Any Persona game is ported to Switch Todd Howard gets on stage Starfield is shown The Elder Scrolls 6 is ignored The Ouya returns Xenoblade Chronicles 3 is announced A new Rabbids game not related to Mario FF7 Remake Part 2 is shown Spiderman anything Dante in Smash Fire Emblem Tellius remakes F-Zero isn’t dead Kojima’s next game is shown Pikmin 4 is shown The Elder Scrolls 6 is shown Playtonic’s new game is announced Xenoblade Chronicles X2 is announced Uncontrollable clapping for Bethesda Remaster that doesn’t look like a remaster BotW 2 is shown Anything 2D Metroid Related Mario and Sonic at the Beijing 2022 Olympic Winter Games is announced Minecraft makes an appearance Master Chief in Smash Silent Hill remake Final Fantasy 16 is shown Dragon Quest XII is shown XCloud comes to Switch An old Square Enix JRPG series is revived Mario & Rabbids sequel is announced Fable 4 is shown Switch gets themes Elden Ring is shown A Mario Odyssey sequel is announced “Strand game” No Metroid Prime 4 news Rhythm Heaven anything A Bethesda employee swears in an attempt to be cool and relatable SMTV is delayed Cloud Strife is on my screen Any Persona game is ported to PC Someone is hologrammed No Pikmin 4 news A presenter isn’t wearing pants Wii Sports comes back Star Fox anything Metal Gear Solid remake Two Smash characters are announced Wii Party 3 is announced Hogwarts Legacy is shown Bayonetta 3 is shown Switch gets folders Keanu Reeves apologizes for Cyberpunk Super Mario Party 2 is announced Square Enix turns a beloved IP into a shitty mobile game Xenoblade Chronicles X is ported Cuphead 2 is announced Doug Bowser makes a Bowser joke Persona 5 Arena is announced Far Cry 6 is shown Pikmin 5 is announced Doom Guy in Smash Square Enix Sony shows up anyway for some reason TWEWY Neo is shown A Smash character releases in June Dragon Quest Overture plays Upgraded Switch not shown Microsoft’s last announcement is disappointing Mario Golf: Super Rush is shown Spy Muppets 2 is announced First party no-one cares about in Smash ARK 2 is shown Sonic Colours Ultimate is shown Bloodborne 2 is announced Square Enix’s last announcement is disappointing Skyward Sword remaster is shown Bioshock 4 is shown Some random influencer you’ve never heard of announces something The middle 20 minutes of the Nintendo Direct is shovelware Some company tries to be sympathetic and relatable through mentioning COVID Sushi Striker 2 is announced New 2D Donkey Kong A presentation is done in an empty auditorium. All clapping is fake Devil May Cry is shown Ubisoft’s last announcement is disappointing Skyrim releases on something new Some non- EA company gets a license for sports games No BotW 2 news Mega Man Battle Network Legacy Collection is announced Ubisoft “But before we go/Just one last thing” Original new Fire Emblem game shown Pokémon Legends Arceus is shown Spore 2 is announced SEGA revives a dead IP A presenter doesn’t have enough space in the shot, stands outside the room in an awkward place Lost Judgement is shown New Yakuza game is announced Fortnite makes an appearance Metal Gear Solid 6 is announced A presenter is muted for their entire segment Just Dance dance number Koizumi snaps Guilty Gear Strive is shown Tom Clancy Soulja Boy makes an appearance Valve disappoints most people Upgraded Switch model is properly announced Microsoft Flight Sim Series X release date announced Mother 3 gets ported to Switch, but only in Japan Pokémon is skipped over entirely in favour of its own presentation Street Fighter anything Cuphead DLC still exists Mother 3 finally gets localized Project Triangle Strategy becomes Triangle Strategy Otterbox releases a new console Fire Emblem Awakening remake New Wario Game Switch Virtual Console is revamped Gex Night N64 added to NSO Nintendo Labo comes back for some reason Upgraded Switch releases 2022 Monolith Soft’s new IP is shown No Bayonetta 3 news Beyond Good and Evil 2 is shown Forspoken is shown Minor/Other Publishers Halo Infinite is shown Persona 5 Racing is announced Next Gen consoles are teased Mega Man Legends Legacy Collection is announced Fallout 5 is announced “No Lootboxes” Tales of Arise is shown Kingdom Hearts anything Another attempt at an Avengers game Animal Crossing amiibo Festival is ported Mario Kart 9 is announced New 3D Kirby Metroid Prime Trilogy is announced for Switch GTA 6 is teased. inactive pops off Half-Life 3 is shown GameBoy is added to NSO Tomb Raider celebrates its anniversary Crash Bandicoot anything That Bethesda “Wooooo” guy comes back Microsoft crossover fighting game is announced Golden Sun isn’t dead Nintendo releases another “99” game Nintendo’s last announcement is disappointing Life is Strange is show Ninja New Kirby spinoff New 2D Kirby Alien Hominid Invasion is shown GTA 5 shows up again Metroid Prime 4 is given a gameplay trailer Splatoon 3 is shown Halo Infinite is delayed Phil Spencer is very proud of his console specs Melee on Switch, but only in a limited release window Project Triangle Strategy gets a good name A presenter leaves a Zoom filter on SMTV is shown Fire Emblem: Genealogy of the Holy War remake Monster Hunter Rise is shown Silksong makes an Appearance anyway Microsoft/Bethesda Bethesda turns a beloved IP into a shitty mobile game Fortnite 2 is announced Pokémon BDSP release date is announced Upgraded Switch releases 2021 Dragon Age 4 is shown Xbox “exclusive” releases on PC Any Halo game comes to Switch Unqualified children present something Crash Bandicoot in Smash Animal Crossing New Horizons is shown Alan Wake 2 is shown New Silent Hill game VirtualBoy is added to NSO Shovel Knight anything Nintendo says they’re “improving online” Switch Calculator gets DLC Assassin’s Creed anything Baten Kaitos anything A new 2D Sonic the Hedgehog game is announced Fallout 76 makes an appearance Dark Souls anything Psychonauts 2 is shown Switch gets a browser Gotham Knights is shown More Zelda ports are announced Virtual Reality anything New 3D Donkey Kong Mother 3 gets remade, but only in Japan Ubisoft has another orchestra no-one cares about Microsoft acquires someone Sonic 2022 is shown Reggie shows up A new Mega Man game (not a collection) is announced General/Meta Final Fantasy 14 is shown Forza is shown Square Enix wins again Mother series gets a trilogy remake We get the yearly montage of how great Bethesda is A presenter forgets they’re not muted, gets cancelled Metroid Prime 4 is teased Any Persona game is ported to Switch Todd Howard gets on stage Starfield is shown The Elder Scrolls 6 is ignored The Ouya returns Xenoblade Chronicles 3 is announced A new Rabbids game not related to Mario FF7 Remake Part 2 is shown Spiderman anything Dante in Smash Fire Emblem Tellius remakes F-Zero isn’t dead Kojima’s next game is shown Pikmin 4 is shown The Elder Scrolls 6 is shown Playtonic’s new game is announced Xenoblade Chronicles X2 is announced Uncontrollable clapping for Bethesda Remaster that doesn’t look like a remaster BotW 2 is shown Anything 2D Metroid Related Mario and Sonic at the Beijing 2022 Olympic Winter Games is announced Minecraft makes an appearance Master Chief in Smash Silent Hill remake Final Fantasy 16 is shown Dragon Quest XII is shown XCloud comes to Switch An old Square Enix JRPG series is revived Mario & Rabbids sequel is announced Fable 4 is shown Switch gets themes Elden Ring is shown A Mario Odyssey sequel is announced “Strand game” No Metroid Prime 4 news Rhythm Heaven anything A Bethesda employee swears in an attempt to be cool and relatable SMTV is delayed Cloud Strife is on my screen Any Persona game is ported to PC Someone is hologrammed No Pikmin 4 news A presenter isn’t wearing pants Wii Sports comes back Star Fox anything Metal Gear Solid remake Two Smash characters are announced Wii Party 3 is announced Hogwarts Legacy is shown Bayonetta 3 is shown Switch gets folders Keanu Reeves apologizes for Cyberpunk Super Mario Party 2 is announced Square Enix turns a beloved IP into a shitty mobile game Xenoblade Chronicles X is ported Cuphead 2 is announced Doug Bowser makes a Bowser joke Persona 5 Arena is announced Far Cry 6 is shown Pikmin 5 is announced Doom Guy in Smash Square Enix Sony shows up anyway for some reason TWEWY Neo is shown A Smash character releases in June Dragon Quest Overture plays Upgraded Switch not shown Microsoft’s last announcement is disappointing Mario Golf: Super Rush is shown Spy Muppets 2 is announced First party no-one cares about in Smash ARK 2 is shown Sonic Colours Ultimate is shown Bloodborne 2 is announced Square Enix’s last announcement is disappointing Skyward Sword remaster is shown Bioshock 4 is shown Some random influencer you’ve never heard of announces something The middle 20 minutes of the Nintendo Direct is shovelware Some company tries to be sympathetic and relatable through mentioning COVID Sushi Striker 2 is announced New 2D Donkey Kong A presentation is done in an empty auditorium. All clapping is fake Devil May Cry is shown Ubisoft’s last announcement is disappointing Skyrim releases on something new Some non- EA company gets a license for sports games No BotW 2 news Mega Man Battle Network Legacy Collection is announced Ubisoft “But before we go/Just one last thing” Original new Fire Emblem game shown Pokémon Legends Arceus is shown Spore 2 is announced SEGA revives a dead IP A presenter doesn’t have enough space in the shot, stands outside the room in an awkward place Lost Judgement is shown New Yakuza game is announced Fortnite makes an appearance Metal Gear Solid 6 is announced A presenter is muted for their entire segment Just Dance dance number Koizumi snaps Guilty Gear Strive is shown Tom Clancy Soulja Boy makes an appearance Valve disappoints most people Upgraded Switch model is properly announced Microsoft Flight Sim Series X release date announced Mother 3 gets ported to Switch, but only in Japan Pokémon is skipped over entirely in favour of its own presentation Street Fighter anything Cuphead DLC still exists Mother 3 finally gets localized
(Print)
Project Triangle Strategy becomes Triangle Strategy
Otterbox releases a new console
Fire Emblem Awakening remake
New Wario Game
Switch Virtual Console is revamped
Gex Night
N64 added to NSO
Nintendo Labo comes back for some reason
Upgraded Switch releases 2022
Monolith Soft’s new IP is shown
No Bayonetta 3 news
Beyond Good and Evil 2 is shown
Forspoken is shown
Minor/Other Publishers
Halo Infinite is shown
Persona 5 Racing is announced
Next Gen consoles are teased
Mega Man Legends Legacy Collection is announced
Fallout 5 is announced
“No Lootboxes”
Tales of Arise is shown
Kingdom Hearts anything
Another attempt at an Avengers game
Animal Crossing amiibo Festival is ported
Mario Kart 9 is announced
New 3D Kirby
Metroid Prime Trilogy is announced for Switch
GTA 6 is teased. inactive pops off
Half-Life 3 is shown
GameBoy is added to NSO
Tomb Raider celebrates its anniversary
Crash Bandicoot anything
That Bethesda “Wooooo” guy comes back
Microsoft crossover fighting game is announced
Golden Sun isn’t dead
Nintendo releases another “99” game
Nintendo’s last announcement is disappointing
Life is Strange is show
Ninja
New Kirby spinoff
New 2D Kirby
Alien Hominid Invasion is shown
GTA 5 shows up again
Metroid Prime 4 is given a gameplay trailer
Splatoon 3 is shown
Halo Infinite is delayed
Phil Spencer is very proud of his console specs
Melee on Switch, but only in a limited release window
Project Triangle Strategy gets a good name
A presenter leaves a Zoom filter on
SMTV is shown
Fire Emblem: Genealogy of the Holy War remake
Monster Hunter Rise is shown
Silksong makes an Appearance anyway
Microsoft/Bethesda
Bethesda turns a beloved IP into a shitty mobile game
Fortnite 2 is announced
Pokémon BDSP release date is announced
Upgraded Switch releases 2021
Dragon Age 4 is shown
Xbox “exclusive” releases on PC
Any Halo game comes to Switch
Unqualified children present something
Crash Bandicoot in Smash
Animal Crossing New Horizons is shown
Alan Wake 2 is shown
New Silent Hill game
VirtualBoy is added to NSO
Shovel Knight anything
Nintendo says they’re “improving online”
Switch Calculator gets DLC
Assassin’s Creed anything
Baten Kaitos anything
A new 2D Sonic the Hedgehog game is announced
Fallout 76 makes an appearance
Dark Souls anything
Psychonauts 2 is shown
Switch gets a browser
Gotham Knights is shown
More Zelda ports are announced
Virtual Reality anything
New 3D Donkey Kong
Mother 3 gets remade, but only in Japan
Ubisoft has another orchestra no-one cares about
Microsoft acquires someone
Sonic 2022 is shown
Reggie shows up
A new Mega Man game (not a collection) is announced
General/Meta
Final Fantasy 14 is shown
Forza is shown
Square Enix wins again
Mother series gets a trilogy remake
We get the yearly montage of how great Bethesda is
A presenter forgets they’re not muted, gets cancelled
Metroid Prime 4 is teased
Any Persona game is ported to Switch
Todd Howard gets on stage
Starfield is shown
The Elder Scrolls 6 is ignored
The Ouya returns
Xenoblade Chronicles 3 is announced
A new Rabbids game not related to Mario
FF7 Remake Part 2 is shown
Spiderman anything
Dante in Smash
Fire Emblem Tellius remakes
F-Zero isn’t dead
Kojima’s next game is shown
Pikmin 4 is shown
The Elder Scrolls 6 is shown
Playtonic’s new game is announced
Xenoblade Chronicles X2 is announced
Uncontrollable clapping for Bethesda
Remaster that doesn’t look like a remaster
BotW 2 is shown
Anything 2D Metroid Related
Mario and Sonic at the Beijing 2022 Olympic Winter Games is announced
Minecraft makes an appearance
Master Chief in Smash
Silent Hill remake
Final Fantasy 16 is shown
Dragon Quest XII is shown
XCloud comes to Switch
An old Square Enix JRPG series is revived
Mario & Rabbids sequel is announced
Fable 4 is shown
Switch gets themes
Elden Ring is shown
A Mario Odyssey sequel is announced
“Strand game”
No Metroid Prime 4 news
Rhythm Heaven anything
A Bethesda employee swears in an attempt to be cool and relatable
SMTV is delayed
Cloud Strife is on my screen
Any Persona game is ported to PC
Someone is hologrammed
No Pikmin 4 news
A presenter isn’t wearing pants
Wii Sports comes back
Star Fox anything
Metal Gear Solid remake
Two Smash characters are announced
Wii Party 3 is announced
Hogwarts Legacy is shown
Bayonetta 3 is shown
Switch gets folders
Keanu Reeves apologizes for Cyberpunk
Super Mario Party 2 is announced
Square Enix turns a beloved IP into a shitty mobile game
Xenoblade Chronicles X is ported
Cuphead 2 is announced
Doug Bowser makes a Bowser joke
Persona 5 Arena is announced
Far Cry 6 is shown
Pikmin 5 is announced
Doom Guy in Smash
Square Enix
Sony shows up anyway for some reason
TWEWY Neo is shown
A Smash character releases in June
Dragon Quest Overture plays
Upgraded Switch not shown
Microsoft’s last announcement is disappointing
Mario Golf: Super Rush is shown
Spy Muppets 2 is announced
First party no-one cares about in Smash
ARK 2 is shown
Sonic Colours Ultimate is shown
Bloodborne 2 is announced
Square Enix’s last announcement is disappointing
Skyward Sword remaster is shown
Bioshock 4 is shown
Some random influencer you’ve never heard of announces something
The middle 20 minutes of the Nintendo Direct is shovelware
Some company tries to be sympathetic and relatable through mentioning COVID
Sushi Striker 2 is announced
New 2D Donkey Kong
A presentation is done in an empty auditorium. All clapping is fake
Devil May Cry is shown
Ubisoft’s last announcement is disappointing
Skyrim releases on something new
Some non-EA company gets a license for sports games
No BotW 2 news
Mega Man Battle Network Legacy Collection is announced
Ubisoft
“But before we go/Just one last thing”
Original new Fire Emblem game shown
Pokémon Legends Arceus is shown
Spore 2 is announced
SEGA revives a dead IP
A presenter doesn’t have enough space in the shot, stands outside the room in an awkward place
Lost Judgement is shown
New Yakuza game is announced
Fortnite makes an appearance
Metal Gear Solid 6 is announced
A presenter is muted for their entire segment
Just Dance dance number
Koizumi snaps
Guilty Gear Strive is shown
Tom Clancy
Soulja Boy makes an appearance
Valve disappoints most people
Upgraded Switch model is properly announced
Microsoft Flight Sim Series X release date announced
Mother 3 gets ported to Switch, but only in Japan
Pokémon is skipped over entirely in favour of its own presentation
Street Fighter anything
Cuphead DLC still exists
Mother 3 finally gets localized
