I don'tknow anddon'treally careIs it ignoranceor apathythat'sdestroying theworld today?“That’sthe lastthing Ineed!”I saw an adfor burialplots, and Ithought:It'sintensetense intentsWhen thepast, present,and future gocamping theyalways argue.AmaybeWhat do youcall a beethat can’tmake up itsmind?Saturdayand Sunday,the rest areweekdaysWhat are thestrongestdays of theweek?MicrowavesWhatwashesup on tinybeaches?AninvestigatorWhat doyou call analligator ina vest?But Icouldn'tfind any.I went to buysomecamouflagetrousersyesterdayThen ithit me.I waswonderingwhy the ballwas gettingbigger.I lostmycaseI tried to suethe airline forlosing myluggage.But noneof themwork.I have a fewjokes aboutunemployedpeople,1 Mrs.Hippie, 2MrsHippies....What do youcall thewives of ahippiepolygamist?are justthewurstGermansausagejokesbut on theother handshe wascompletelyfineJill brokeher fingertodayTequilamockingbirdWhat do youget whenyou mixalcohol andliterature?I NoahguyNeedan ark?Ireland.Every dayit’s Dublin.Which country’scapital has thefastest-growingpopulation?YouplanetHow doyou throwa spaceparty?What did thegrape saywhen it gotstepped on?Nothing -but it letout a littlewhineThere’s nomenu - youget what youdeserveHear aboutthe newrestaurantcalledKarma?He's allrightnow.Did you hearabout the guywhose wholeleft side wascut off?I could doit with myeyesclosedSleepingcomes sonaturallyto menow I'mnot sosureI used tobeindecisiveSUPPLIES!What did thejanitor saywhen hejumped out ofthe closet?Remainsto beseen.Will glasscoffins beasuccess?A woman askedme to checkher balance, soI pushed heroverI lost my jobat the bankon my veryfirst day.All I didwas takea day offI can’tbelieve I gotfired fromthe calendarfactory.That’sridiculous.My dogsdon’t evenown bikesA police officer justknocked on mydoor and told memy dogs arechasing people onbikes.I don'tknow anddon'treally careIs it ignoranceor apathythat'sdestroying theworld today?“That’sthe lastthing Ineed!”I saw an adfor burialplots, and Ithought:It'sintensetense intentsWhen thepast, present,and future gocamping theyalways argue.AmaybeWhat do youcall a beethat can’tmake up itsmind?Saturdayand Sunday,the rest areweekdaysWhat are thestrongestdays of theweek?MicrowavesWhatwashesup on tinybeaches?AninvestigatorWhat doyou call analligator ina vest?But Icouldn'tfind any.I went to buysomecamouflagetrousersyesterdayThen ithit me.I waswonderingwhy the ballwas gettingbigger.I lostmycaseI tried to suethe airline forlosing myluggage.But noneof themwork.I have a fewjokes aboutunemployedpeople,1 Mrs.Hippie, 2MrsHippies....What do youcall thewives of ahippiepolygamist?are justthewurstGermansausagejokesbut on theother handshe wascompletelyfineJill brokeher fingertodayTequilamockingbirdWhat do youget whenyou mixalcohol andliterature?I NoahguyNeedan ark?Ireland.Every dayit’s Dublin.Which country’scapital has thefastest-growingpopulation?YouplanetHow doyou throwa spaceparty?What did thegrape saywhen it gotstepped on?Nothing -but it letout a littlewhineThere’s nomenu - youget what youdeserveHear aboutthe newrestaurantcalledKarma?He's allrightnow.Did you hearabout the guywhose wholeleft side wascut off?I could doit with myeyesclosedSleepingcomes sonaturallyto menow I'mnot sosureI used tobeindecisiveSUPPLIES!What did thejanitor saywhen hejumped out ofthe closet?Remainsto beseen.Will glasscoffins beasuccess?A woman askedme to checkher balance, soI pushed heroverI lost my jobat the bankon my veryfirst day.All I didwas takea day offI can’tbelieve I gotfired fromthe calendarfactory.That’sridiculous.My dogsdon’t evenown bikesA police officer justknocked on mydoor and told memy dogs arechasing people onbikes.

Puns and Jokes - Call List

(Print) Use this randomly generated list as your call list when playing the game. There is no need to say the BINGO column name. Place some kind of mark (like an X, a checkmark, a dot, tally mark, etc) on each cell as you announce it, to keep track. You can also cut out each item, place them in a bag and pull words from the bag.


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  1. Is it ignorance or apathy that's destroying the world today?
    I don't know and don't really care
  2. I saw an ad for burial plots, and I thought:
    “That’s the last thing I need!”
  3. When the past, present, and future go camping they always argue.
    It's intense tense in tents
  4. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind?
    A maybe
  5. What are the strongest days of the week?
    Saturday and Sunday, the rest are weekdays
  6. What washes up on tiny beaches?
    Microwaves
  7. What do you call an alligator in a vest?
    An investigator
  8. I went to buy some camouflage trousers yesterday
    But I couldn't find any.
  9. I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger.
    Then it hit me.
  10. I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage.
    I lost my case
  11. I have a few jokes about unemployed people,
    But none of them work.
  12. What do you call the wives of a hippie polygamist?
    1 Mrs. Hippie, 2 Mrs Hippies....
  13. German sausage jokes
    are just the wurst
  14. Jill broke her finger today
    but on the other hand she was completely fine
  15. What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature?
    Tequila mockingbird
  16. Need an ark?
    I Noah guy
  17. Which country’s capital has the fastest-growing population?
    Ireland. Every day it’s Dublin.
  18. How do you throw a space party?
    You planet
  19. Nothing - but it let out a little whine
    What did the grape say when it got stepped on?
  20. Hear about the new restaurant called Karma?
    There’s no menu - you get what you deserve
  21. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?
    He's all right now.
  22. Sleeping comes so naturally to me
    I could do it with my eyes closed
  23. I used to be indecisive
    now I'm not so sure
  24. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
    SUPPLIES!
  25. Will glass coffins be a success?
    Remains to be seen.
  26. I lost my job at the bank on my very first day.
    A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over
  27. I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory.
    All I did was take a day off
  28. A police officer just knocked on my door and told me my dogs are chasing people on bikes.
    That’s ridiculous. My dogs don’t even own bikes