I could doit with myeyesclosedSleepingcomes sonaturallyto meI don'tknow anddon'treally careIs it ignoranceor apathythat'sdestroying theworld today?Saturdayand Sunday,the rest areweekdaysWhat are thestrongestdays of theweek?AmaybeWhat do youcall a beethat can’tmake up itsmind?Then ithit me.I waswonderingwhy the ballwas gettingbigger.What did thegrape saywhen it gotstepped on?Nothing -but it letout a littlewhineIreland.Every dayit’s Dublin.Which country’scapital has thefastest-growingpopulation?now I'mnot sosureI used tobeindecisiveI NoahguyNeedan ark?All I didwas takea day offI can’tbelieve I gotfired fromthe calendarfactory.A woman askedme to checkher balance, soI pushed heroverI lost my jobat the bankon my veryfirst day.TequilamockingbirdWhat do youget whenyou mixalcohol andliterature?I lostmycaseI tried to suethe airline forlosing myluggage.But noneof themwork.I have a fewjokes aboutunemployedpeople,SUPPLIES!What did thejanitor saywhen hejumped out ofthe closet?It'sintensetense intentsWhen thepast, present,and future gocamping theyalways argue.but on theother handshe wascompletelyfineJill brokeher fingertodayMicrowavesWhatwashesup on tinybeaches?He's allrightnow.Did you hearabout the guywhose wholeleft side wascut off?That’sridiculous.My dogsdon’t evenown bikesA police officer justknocked on mydoor and told memy dogs arechasing people onbikes.AninvestigatorWhat doyou call analligator ina vest?are justthewurstGermansausagejokesBut Icouldn'tfind any.I went to buysomecamouflagetrousersyesterday“That’sthe lastthing Ineed!”I saw an adfor burialplots, and Ithought:YouplanetHow doyou throwa spaceparty?There’s nomenu - youget what youdeserveHear aboutthe newrestaurantcalledKarma?Remainsto beseen.Will glasscoffins beasuccess?1 Mrs.Hippie, 2MrsHippies....What do youcall thewives of ahippiepolygamist?I could doit with myeyesclosedSleepingcomes sonaturallyto meI don'tknow anddon'treally careIs it ignoranceor apathythat'sdestroying theworld today?Saturdayand Sunday,the rest areweekdaysWhat are thestrongestdays of theweek?AmaybeWhat do youcall a beethat can’tmake up itsmind?Then ithit me.I waswonderingwhy the ballwas gettingbigger.What did thegrape saywhen it gotstepped on?Nothing -but it letout a littlewhineIreland.Every dayit’s Dublin.Which country’scapital has thefastest-growingpopulation?now I'mnot sosureI used tobeindecisiveI NoahguyNeedan ark?All I didwas takea day offI can’tbelieve I gotfired fromthe calendarfactory.A woman askedme to checkher balance, soI pushed heroverI lost my jobat the bankon my veryfirst day.TequilamockingbirdWhat do youget whenyou mixalcohol andliterature?I lostmycaseI tried to suethe airline forlosing myluggage.But noneof themwork.I have a fewjokes aboutunemployedpeople,SUPPLIES!What did thejanitor saywhen hejumped out ofthe closet?It'sintensetense intentsWhen thepast, present,and future gocamping theyalways argue.but on theother handshe wascompletelyfineJill brokeher fingertodayMicrowavesWhatwashesup on tinybeaches?He's allrightnow.Did you hearabout the guywhose wholeleft side wascut off?That’sridiculous.My dogsdon’t evenown bikesA police officer justknocked on mydoor and told memy dogs arechasing people onbikes.AninvestigatorWhat doyou call analligator ina vest?are justthewurstGermansausagejokesBut Icouldn'tfind any.I went to buysomecamouflagetrousersyesterday“That’sthe lastthing Ineed!”I saw an adfor burialplots, and Ithought:YouplanetHow doyou throwa spaceparty?There’s nomenu - youget what youdeserveHear aboutthe newrestaurantcalledKarma?Remainsto beseen.Will glasscoffins beasuccess?1 Mrs.Hippie, 2MrsHippies....What do youcall thewives of ahippiepolygamist?

Puns and Jokes - Call List

(Print) Use this randomly generated list as your call list when playing the game. There is no need to say the BINGO column name. Place some kind of mark (like an X, a checkmark, a dot, tally mark, etc) on each cell as you announce it, to keep track. You can also cut out each item, place them in a bag and pull words from the bag.


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  1. Sleeping comes so naturally to me
    I could do it with my eyes closed
  2. Is it ignorance or apathy that's destroying the world today?
    I don't know and don't really care
  3. What are the strongest days of the week?
    Saturday and Sunday, the rest are weekdays
  4. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind?
    A maybe
  5. I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger.
    Then it hit me.
  6. Nothing - but it let out a little whine
    What did the grape say when it got stepped on?
  7. Which country’s capital has the fastest-growing population?
    Ireland. Every day it’s Dublin.
  8. I used to be indecisive
    now I'm not so sure
  9. Need an ark?
    I Noah guy
  10. I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory.
    All I did was take a day off
  11. I lost my job at the bank on my very first day.
    A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over
  12. What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature?
    Tequila mockingbird
  13. I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage.
    I lost my case
  14. I have a few jokes about unemployed people,
    But none of them work.
  15. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
    SUPPLIES!
  16. When the past, present, and future go camping they always argue.
    It's intense tense in tents
  17. Jill broke her finger today
    but on the other hand she was completely fine
  18. What washes up on tiny beaches?
    Microwaves
  19. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?
    He's all right now.
  20. A police officer just knocked on my door and told me my dogs are chasing people on bikes.
    That’s ridiculous. My dogs don’t even own bikes
  21. What do you call an alligator in a vest?
    An investigator
  22. German sausage jokes
    are just the wurst
  23. I went to buy some camouflage trousers yesterday
    But I couldn't find any.
  24. I saw an ad for burial plots, and I thought:
    “That’s the last thing I need!”
  25. How do you throw a space party?
    You planet
  26. Hear about the new restaurant called Karma?
    There’s no menu - you get what you deserve
  27. Will glass coffins be a success?
    Remains to be seen.
  28. What do you call the wives of a hippie polygamist?
    1 Mrs. Hippie, 2 Mrs Hippies....