shorthairVisual designutterly lacks thegrandeur of asupposed"Herald of theOld World"Vlad ischarming andsassy bututterly lacking acoherentidentityRiottrivialisesblood magicto the pointof mundanitymeaninglessreference toCamavornot writtenby acreepygoth girlqueerphobicclicheVA soundsanemic; lacksthe richnessof Newbon orFreemanout-of-placemarketingbeatJ-rocklooklacks anyreal menacewhatsoever,makes apoor villainLooks likeSwaincould behis dadstoryending isrushedJesse &Jamesvibes withLeBlancbadqueerbaitRiot fails tobalancegrotesque andhot; we getbland genericappealPlayedas ajokeRiot fails tobalancegrotesque andhot; we getdistasteful B-movie horrorthematicincoherenceBlood magicwritten likegenericvampirismmotivationsdon't makesensewriterdidn't dotheirresearchHey,Astarionfangirls, wedid it first!(Reluctantly.)classicvampirereferenceshorthairVisual designutterly lacks thegrandeur of asupposed"Herald of theOld World"Vlad ischarming andsassy bututterly lacking acoherentidentityRiottrivialisesblood magicto the pointof mundanitymeaninglessreference toCamavornot writtenby acreepygoth girlqueerphobicclicheVA soundsanemic; lacksthe richnessof Newbon orFreemanout-of-placemarketingbeatJ-rocklooklacks anyreal menacewhatsoever,makes apoor villainLooks likeSwaincould behis dadstoryending isrushedJesse &Jamesvibes withLeBlancbadqueerbaitRiot fails tobalancegrotesque andhot; we getbland genericappealPlayedas ajokeRiot fails tobalancegrotesque andhot; we getdistasteful B-movie horrorthematicincoherenceBlood magicwritten likegenericvampirismmotivationsdon't makesensewriterdidn't dotheirresearchHey,Astarionfangirls, wedid it first!(Reluctantly.)classicvampirereference

Riot Vladimir Fuckup Bingo - Call List

(Print) Use this randomly generated list as your call list when playing the game. There is no need to say the BINGO column name. Place some kind of mark (like an X, a checkmark, a dot, tally mark, etc) on each cell as you announce it, to keep track. You can also cut out each item, place them in a bag and pull words from the bag.


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  1. short hair
  2. Visual design utterly lacks the grandeur of a supposed "Herald of the Old World"
  3. Vlad is charming and sassy but utterly lacking a coherent identity
  4. Riot trivialises blood magic to the point of mundanity
  5. meaningless reference to Camavor
  6. not written by a creepy goth girl
  7. queerphobic cliche
  8. VA sounds anemic; lacks the richness of Newbon or Freeman
  9. out-of-place marketing beat
  10. J-rock look
  11. lacks any real menace whatsoever, makes a poor villain
  12. Looks like Swain could be his dad
  13. story ending is rushed
  14. Jesse & James vibes with LeBlanc
  15. bad queerbait
  16. Riot fails to balance grotesque and hot; we get bland generic appeal
  17. Played as a joke
  18. Riot fails to balance grotesque and hot; we get distasteful B-movie horror
  19. thematic incoherence
  20. Blood magic written like generic vampirism
  21. motivations don't make sense
  22. writer didn't do their research
  23. Hey, Astarion fangirls, we did it first! (Reluctantly.)
  24. classic vampire reference