ALICE Training Bingo

This bingo card has a free space and 75 words: Administrator says, “This is for your safety,” while sipping an iced latte., Cop brings real gun to school for “authenticity.”, Drama teacher volunteers to “play the shooter” and goes full method., Fire alarm goes off mid-drill. Everyone pretends it’s part of the script., Teacher whispers, “This is so dumb,” under their breath while crying internally., Office forgets to tell a substitute janitor. Panic ensues., PE teacher tries to “tackle” the officer as a joke. Regrets it., Guidance counselor starts processing trauma mid-drill., Real emergency happens. Drill proceeds anyway., Cop explains tactics like it’s a TED Talk., Someone refers to this as “live-action professional development.”, Teacher tries to livestream the drill to their spouse. Signal dies., Cop forgets everyone's names and calls them all “buddy.”, Principal says “great energy today” like this isn’t a tragedy rehearsal., School psychologist starts a group breathing exercise in the corner., Cop tries to flirt with the school nurse. Again., Math teacher pulls out graph paper for "escape route optimization.", Custodian locks themselves in the boiler room, refuses to emerge., Teacher jokes, “At least it’s not a staff meeting,” and gets death glares., Fire marshal walks in by accident. Leaves quickly., PA system cuts out in the middle of an alert., Vice principal uses a megaphone “just to be helpful.”, Someone arrives late and walks into a fake crime scene., School resource officer arrives dressed like he’s in SWAT., Admin brings donuts to “make it fun.”, Someone laughs and immediately regrets it., History teacher compares the drill to the fall of the Roman Empire., Teacher eats a protein bar behind a flipped table., Someone finds a decades-old “crisis binder.” It’s useless., Art teacher tries to paint the experience in real-time., Teacher takes roll of their department out of habit., Cafeteria manager hides in the walk-in freezer., Admin tries to take photos “for the newsletter.”, Staff member uses the distraction to sneak out for a smoke., Security camera glitches and shows two of the same person., Cop casually drops the term “kill house.” No one breathes., Tech guy live-tweets it with #FacultyFridays., Someone tests their smartwatch’s heart rate monitor—regrets it., District supervisor shows up mid-drill and says, “Excellent work.”, Special ed teacher still has no functioning door lock., Cop’s body cam falls off. They blame a ghost., Language arts teacher starts writing a poem in the supply closet., Teacher’s Zoom meeting with their side hustle continues in background., Assistant principal gets locked in their own office., Admin yells “GO GO GO” and knocks over a trash can., Someone genuinely tries to barricade with a rolling whiteboard., Cop says “clear” too enthusiastically and startles everyone., Bluetooth speaker somewhere plays "Eye of the Tiger" by mistake., STEM teacher tests sound reflection angles using a protractor., No one knows if this is the drill or if it started 20 minutes ago., Officer keeps sunglasses on indoors. Won’t explain., Door to gym won’t open. It never did. Still doesn’t., Someone references The Office during the drill. Immediate groans., Someone brings fake blood from Halloween leftovers. It's not funny., School librarian hides under a circulation desk with snacks., Entire English department writes “Dear Diary” entries in unison., Admin won’t stop calling it a “learning opportunity.”, Wi-Fi dies. This somehow makes everything worse., Theater tech uses the moment to test out a fog machine., One teacher is still grading essays under a table., School nurse sets up an “injury triage” corner. It’s just Band-Aids., Someone asks if this counts for continuing ed hours., Cop uses too many acronyms. No one knows what “FDLE-PJRT” means., Counselor is actively crying. No one asks., District IT rep gets lost and ends up hiding in AV closet., School secretary plays Candy Crush in a “secure location.”, Coach climbs out a window “just in case” and gets stuck., Social studies teacher references Cold War paranoia too accurately., Someone uses a dry erase board as a riot shield., Microwave dings in the break room mid-briefing. Tension broken., Staff member yells “BINGO!” unironically and gets tackled., Instructional coach treats this like a team-building activity., Someone finds an old worksheet from 2004 labeled “Shooter Drill Prep.”, “This went better than last year” is said. That’s the bar. and Drill ends. Nobody claps. Everyone quietly leaves like ghosts..

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