"Over 300 reports" brag Dead air while hunting for a record Customer: "No, what I'm asking is..." Blames the internet or demo site Demos the thing the AE said to skip "Real quick" (it isn't) Leading question ("Isn't that simpler?") Ends with "That's everything on my list" "Does that make sense?" "Right?" tacked onto a statement Customer takes over the agenda 5+ minutes without the customer talking "You can also..." 3x in a row Customer asks to make the screen bigger Customer: "Don't spend too much time on that" "This is all configurable" Feature shown with no "so that you can..." Unexplained jargon (header record, data glance) "Over here... up here... down here" "Kind of" / "sort of" Opens with a dashboard tour Asks something already in the discovery notes Long answer to a yes/no question "Basically" "Ignore that, it's demo data" Yes/no question gets a one- word answer Guesses how the competitor works Customer has to repeat their question Explains why a screen looks old "I'd have to double check" (no owner, no date) "Obviously" "Any questions so far?" "If you will" Customer: "Sorry to interrupt..." Asks a question, then answers it for them Answers a question nobody asked "It's on the roadmap" "We'll come back to that" (never does) SE not on at kickoff Stakeholder drops off, no recap for them Stacks 2+ questions in one breath "Can you see my screen?" Narrates clicks ("hit OK, hit next") Keeps going after "we don't need that" AE and SE fact-check each other live "So from here..." Calls someone by the wrong name "Sorry" said 3+ times "Perfect!" as a reflex "So, yeah..." "Over 300 reports" brag Dead air while hunting for a record Customer: "No, what I'm asking is..." Blames the internet or demo site Demos the thing the AE said to skip "Real quick" (it isn't) Leading question ("Isn't that simpler?") Ends with "That's everything on my list" "Does that make sense?" "Right?" tacked onto a statement Customer takes over the agenda 5+ minutes without the customer talking "You can also..." 3x in a row Customer asks to make the screen bigger Customer: "Don't spend too much time on that" "This is all configurable" Feature shown with no "so that you can..." Unexplained jargon (header record, data glance) "Over here... up here... down here" "Kind of" / "sort of" Opens with a dashboard tour Asks something already in the discovery notes Long answer to a yes/no question "Basically" "Ignore that, it's demo data" Yes/no question gets a one- word answer Guesses how the competitor works Customer has to repeat their question Explains why a screen looks old "I'd have to double check" (no owner, no date) "Obviously" "Any questions so far?" "If you will" Customer: "Sorry to interrupt..." Asks a question, then answers it for them Answers a question nobody asked "It's on the roadmap" "We'll come back to that" (never does) SE not on at kickoff Stakeholder drops off, no recap for them Stacks 2+ questions in one breath "Can you see my screen?" Narrates clicks ("hit OK, hit next") Keeps going after "we don't need that" AE and SE fact-check each other live "So from here..." Calls someone by the wrong name "Sorry" said 3+ times "Perfect!" as a reflex "So, yeah..."
(Print)
"Over 300 reports" brag
Dead air while hunting for a record
Customer: "No, what I'm asking is..."
Blames the internet or demo site
Demos the thing the AE said to skip
"Real quick" (it isn't)
Leading question ("Isn't that simpler?")
Ends with "That's everything on my list"
"Does that make sense?"
"Right?" tacked onto a statement
Customer takes over the agenda
5+ minutes without the customer talking
"You can also..." 3x in a row
Customer asks to make the screen bigger
Customer: "Don't spend too much time on that"
"This is all configurable"
Feature shown with no "so that you can..."
Unexplained jargon (header record, data glance)
"Over here... up here... down here"
"Kind of" / "sort of"
Opens with a dashboard tour
Asks something already in the discovery notes
Long answer to a yes/no question
"Basically"
"Ignore that, it's demo data"
Yes/no question gets a one-word answer
Guesses how the competitor works
Customer has to repeat their question
Explains why a screen looks old
"I'd have to double check" (no owner, no date)
"Obviously"
"Any questions so far?"
"If you will"
Customer: "Sorry to interrupt..."
Asks a question, then answers it for them
Answers a question nobody asked
"It's on the roadmap"
"We'll come back to that" (never does)
SE not on at kickoff
Stakeholder drops off, no recap for them
Stacks 2+ questions in one breath
"Can you see my screen?"
Narrates clicks ("hit OK, hit next")
Keeps going after "we don't need that"
AE and SE fact-check each other live
"So from here..."
Calls someone by the wrong name
"Sorry" said 3+ times
"Perfect!" as a reflex
"So, yeah..."
