Your little cousinthat eats too manysweets beforedinner andALWAYS ends uppuking."Chanukkahactually alreadyhappened.....yeah,it happend amonth earlier thisyear"Dad insisting ongetting a real treethis year thencomplaining that hehas to clean up allthe needlesFruitcakes.Why?StarbucksHoliday CupControversiesWondering whatJewish people findso appealingaboutManischewitz, theworst wine knownto manCreepy CGITom Hanksin "The PolarExpress""The WaronChristmas"Grandma'sitchysweatersGaining a newappreciation forMom after tryingand failing toreplicate her roastfor your friends.Bubbereminding youthat Chanukkahisn't even ahigh holidayMariahCareyHolidaybingo atofficeChristmasPartiesRealizing thatmuch of "Love,Actually" doesn'tactually hold upthat wellMom and Dadputting you on thephone with greatuncle so-and-so,whom you'venever actually met.Wondering whatthe Gentiles findso appealingabout eggnog, theworst dairyproduct known tomanBeing forcedto go toMidnightMassKrampusJust getting frozenhashbrowns andcalling them "Latkes"because makingthem from scratch isjust a lot of gratingand you don't have afood processor."Why don't wejust forget yourparents and goto Hawaii thisyear?"SexySantasDustyChanukkahdecorations inan impossible toreach corner ofthe storeLoving every minuteof all this holidaynonsense becauseit wouldn't feel rightif it happened anyother way.Another yeargone bywithout a newChanukkahmovieRealizing theclassic song"WhiteChristmas" wasactually writtenby JewsYour one cousin thatsway to into highschool choir findingany excuse to sing"Oh Holy Night" atthe top of their lungs.That one Auntcomplainingabout howChristmas hasbecome toocommercializedBeing oldenough torealize newsocks areactually THEBESTMom kickingeveryone out ofthe kitchen thencomplaining thatnobody helpedwith the holidaydinnerThat one friend onfacebook alwaysshouting aboutChristmas beingstolen from thePagans. We get it.Realizing askingWinston to writethe Chirstmasparty bingo cardswas a WILDchoiceReally onlygetting aPanettone tomake frenchtoast with it themorning after.Your little cousinthat eats too manysweets beforedinner andALWAYS ends uppuking."Chanukkahactually alreadyhappened.....yeah,it happend amonth earlier thisyear"Dad insisting ongetting a real treethis year thencomplaining that hehas to clean up allthe needlesFruitcakes.Why?StarbucksHoliday CupControversiesWondering whatJewish people findso appealingaboutManischewitz, theworst wine knownto manCreepy CGITom Hanksin "The PolarExpress""The WaronChristmas"Grandma'sitchysweatersGaining a newappreciation forMom after tryingand failing toreplicate her roastfor your friends.Bubbereminding youthat Chanukkahisn't even ahigh holidayMariahCareyHolidaybingo atofficeChristmasPartiesRealizing thatmuch of "Love,Actually" doesn'tactually hold upthat wellMom and Dadputting you on thephone with greatuncle so-and-so,whom you'venever actually met.Wondering whatthe Gentiles findso appealingabout eggnog, theworst dairyproduct known tomanBeing forcedto go toMidnightMassKrampusJust getting frozenhashbrowns andcalling them "Latkes"because makingthem from scratch isjust a lot of gratingand you don't have afood processor."Why don't wejust forget yourparents and goto Hawaii thisyear?"SexySantasDustyChanukkahdecorations inan impossible toreach corner ofthe storeLoving every minuteof all this holidaynonsense becauseit wouldn't feel rightif it happened anyother way.Another yeargone bywithout a newChanukkahmovieRealizing theclassic song"WhiteChristmas" wasactually writtenby JewsYour one cousin thatsway to into highschool choir findingany excuse to sing"Oh Holy Night" atthe top of their lungs.That one Auntcomplainingabout howChristmas hasbecome toocommercializedBeing oldenough torealize newsocks areactually THEBESTMom kickingeveryone out ofthe kitchen thencomplaining thatnobody helpedwith the holidaydinnerThat one friend onfacebook alwaysshouting aboutChristmas beingstolen from thePagans. We get it.Realizing askingWinston to writethe Chirstmasparty bingo cardswas a WILDchoiceReally onlygetting aPanettone tomake frenchtoast with it themorning after.

Snarky Holiday Bingo - Call List

(Print) Use this randomly generated list as your call list when playing the game. There is no need to say the BINGO column name. Place some kind of mark (like an X, a checkmark, a dot, tally mark, etc) on each cell as you announce it, to keep track. You can also cut out each item, place them in a bag and pull words from the bag.


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  1. Your little cousin that eats too many sweets before dinner and ALWAYS ends up puking.
  2. "Chanukkah actually already happened.....yeah, it happend a month earlier this year"
  3. Dad insisting on getting a real tree this year then complaining that he has to clean up all the needles
  4. Fruitcakes. Why?
  5. Starbucks Holiday Cup Controversies
  6. Wondering what Jewish people find so appealing about Manischewitz, the worst wine known to man
  7. Creepy CGI Tom Hanks in "The Polar Express"
  8. "The War on Christmas"
  9. Grandma's itchy sweaters
  10. Gaining a new appreciation for Mom after trying and failing to replicate her roast for your friends.
  11. Bubbe reminding you that Chanukkah isn't even a high holiday
  12. Mariah Carey
  13. Holiday bingo at office Christmas Parties
  14. Realizing that much of "Love, Actually" doesn't actually hold up that well
  15. Mom and Dad putting you on the phone with great uncle so-and-so, whom you've never actually met.
  16. Wondering what the Gentiles find so appealing about eggnog, the worst dairy product known to man
  17. Being forced to go to Midnight Mass
  18. Krampus
  19. Just getting frozen hashbrowns and calling them "Latkes" because making them from scratch is just a lot of grating and you don't have a food processor.
  20. "Why don't we just forget your parents and go to Hawaii this year?"
  21. Sexy Santas
  22. Dusty Chanukkah decorations in an impossible to reach corner of the store
  23. Loving every minute of all this holiday nonsense because it wouldn't feel right if it happened any other way.
  24. Another year gone by without a new Chanukkah movie
  25. Realizing the classic song "White Christmas" was actually written by Jews
  26. Your one cousin thats way to into high school choir finding any excuse to sing "Oh Holy Night" at the top of their lungs.
  27. That one Aunt complaining about how Christmas has become too commercialized
  28. Being old enough to realize new socks are actually THE BEST
  29. Mom kicking everyone out of the kitchen then complaining that nobody helped with the holiday dinner
  30. That one friend on facebook always shouting about Christmas being stolen from the Pagans. We get it.
  31. Realizing asking Winston to write the Chirstmas party bingo cards was a WILD choice
  32. Really only getting a Panettone to make french toast with it the morning after.