OUTAGE Clipped hold music Client updates the case, then calls repeatedly Call MDT, nobody answers Case is a word salad, client isn't much better Who needs last names in an employee directory? Not this client User Error Directory spells every name Voicemail is full PDF Crashes where the settings are wrong 15m of access issues Phone system voice is clearly a screen reader First option in directory is asking if you want the directory Phone system is alternating voices for each choice Escalation Case is high or urgent, issue is trivial No employee directory Half the directory is no name, just extension number Client says they followed steps, but didn't Client clicked callback button, didn't explain why Typed in the name, get someone else "can you give any insight..." Third- Party IT Staff Upgrade fixes issue, client doesn't want to upgrade Client who is always a jerk MDT Actually Answers Hold time of 5 minutes or more "The credit union is now closed" Case is high or urgent, issue has existed for "a while" "The release broke it" but it never worked Voicemail is not set up yet Client thinks you're the greatest for a simple fix Network issues "but our network is fine" Code is old enough to drive Voicemail has neither extension nor name No way to talk to a human The employee directory is the LAST CHOICE Have to sit through entire directory Code is old enough to drink The phone system has a first name Client has opened several cases in a row, only answers phone once. Rare products: ACSJ, CIR, OnBase, HMDA Weird flute or whistle music while on hold "Call me!" you get voicemail Code is an unsupported nightmare Phone system too cheerful Client is mad about the answer (not an upgrade) "You've reach the end of the numbers!" OUTAGE Clipped hold music Client updates the case, then calls repeatedly Call MDT, nobody answers Case is a word salad, client isn't much better Who needs last names in an employee directory? Not this client User Error Directory spells every name Voicemail is full PDF Crashes where the settings are wrong 15m of access issues Phone system voice is clearly a screen reader First option in directory is asking if you want the directory Phone system is alternating voices for each choice Escalation Case is high or urgent, issue is trivial No employee directory Half the directory is no name, just extension number Client says they followed steps, but didn't Client clicked callback button, didn't explain why Typed in the name, get someone else "can you give any insight..." Third- Party IT Staff Upgrade fixes issue, client doesn't want to upgrade Client who is always a jerk MDT Actually Answers Hold time of 5 minutes or more "The credit union is now closed" Case is high or urgent, issue has existed for "a while" "The release broke it" but it never worked Voicemail is not set up yet Client thinks you're the greatest for a simple fix Network issues "but our network is fine" Code is old enough to drive Voicemail has neither extension nor name No way to talk to a human The employee directory is the LAST CHOICE Have to sit through entire directory Code is old enough to drink The phone system has a first name Client has opened several cases in a row, only answers phone once. Rare products: ACSJ, CIR, OnBase, HMDA Weird flute or whistle music while on hold "Call me!" you get voicemail Code is an unsupported nightmare Phone system too cheerful Client is mad about the answer (not an upgrade) "You've reach the end of the numbers!"
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OUTAGE
Clipped hold music
Client updates the case, then calls repeatedly
Call MDT, nobody answers
Case is a word salad, client isn't much better
Who needs last names in an employee directory? Not this client
User Error
Directory spells every name
Voicemail is full
PDF Crashes where the settings are wrong
15m of access issues
Phone system voice is clearly a screen reader
First option in directory is asking if you want the directory
Phone system is alternating voices for each choice
Escalation
Case is high or urgent, issue is trivial
No employee directory
Half the directory is no name, just extension number
Client says they followed steps, but didn't
Client clicked callback button, didn't explain why
Typed in the name, get someone else
"can you give any insight..."
Third-Party IT Staff
Upgrade fixes issue, client doesn't want to upgrade
Client who is always a jerk
MDT Actually Answers
Hold time of 5 minutes or more
"The credit union is now closed"
Case is high or urgent, issue has existed for "a while"
"The release broke it" but it never worked
Voicemail is not set up yet
Client thinks you're the greatest for a simple fix
Network issues "but our network is fine"
Code is old enough to drive
Voicemail has neither extension nor name
No way to talk to a human
The employee directory is the LAST CHOICE
Have to sit through entire directory
Code is old enough to drink
The phone system has a first name
Client has opened several cases in a row, only answers phone once.
Rare products: ACSJ, CIR, OnBase, HMDA
Weird flute or whistle music while on hold
"Call me!" you get voicemail
Code is an unsupported nightmare
Phone system too cheerful
Client is mad about the answer (not an upgrade)
"You've reach the end of the numbers!"
