"World’s largest rubber duck declared a sovereign nation.", "Elon Musk announces AI pet dinosaur.", Jeff Goldblum discovers lost city under Arby’s "Panda protests for better bamboo rights.", Turkey pays EU in doner kebabs Ukraine exports snowball weapons to Finland "Bigfoot spotted grocery shopping in Ohio.", "UFO claims diplomatic immunity from NASA.", Australia trades uranium for French cheese "Aliens demand rights during UN meeting.", "Fake viral meme causes stock market to crash.", Congress renames Tuesday “Freedom Ham Day” "Talking parrots run for mayor in Florida.", Canada mistakenly invades Wisconsin during drill Lady Gaga knighted by King Charles Zelensky moonwalks into NATO press conference Putin wins judo match against robot Oprah buys Twitter, bans all politicians Israel legalizes teleportation for military use Beyoncé replaces Lincoln on penny design Zuckerberg unveils mind-reading Meta contacts "Time traveler forgets keys in 2024, causes chaos.", Dwayne Johnson becomes head of NATO Iran blames inflation on Western emojis UN holds peace talks inside IKEA NATO summit invaded by wild peacocks "Subway stations renamed after famous memes.", US-China tariff dispute ends in karaoke "Nuclear- powered bicycle races held in Switzerland.", Florida bans clouds for hurricane season World leaders compete in Mario Kart Rudy Giuliani bitten by emotional support bat Trump pardons himself via skywriting plane "Cats demand equal rights in human government.", Biden accidentally tweets nuclear launch codes India launches “No Meetings Mondays” global treaty "Nuclear toaster causes nationwide panic.", UK sells Buckingham Palace to Jeff Bezos "Martians open interplanetary yoga studio.", Russia accidentally sanctions itself, blames hackers Russian oligarch buys entire Swiss village Gaza ceasefire brokered by K-pop band Bernie Sanders starts punk rock band NASA reveals Saturn smells like Axe Trump paints Mount Rushmore with Sharpie Netflix airs 24/7 Joe Rogan channel Poland bans Excel after “data trauma” Russia trades oil for Taylor Swift tickets Global summit held entirely on Discord "Hologram Elvis performs at Glastonbury Festival.", Yemen declares national llama appreciation day "Dogs hold secret puppet show for humans.", "Weather forecast predicts raining chocolate chips.", "Holographic pizza becomes the new currency.", Putin records EDM album for diplomacy "Aliens buy all Earth’s seaside properties.", UN declares pizza a global currency "Weather app predicts daily weather based on mood.", Beyoncé buys entire island of Malta NATO accepts Antarctica as member state "Penguins spotted taking over Miami Beach.", "Global cheese shortage triggers riot in France.", NASA confirms moon filled with cheese Global South forms anti-G7 boy band Kim Kardashian wins Nobel Peace Prize Congress debates outlawing pineapple on pizza Trump declares war on New Jersey Pope live- streams Fortnite tournament fundraiser Israel- Palestine truce signed on Minecraft server "Lizard people announce new government in secret.", Greta Thunberg powers Iceland with frowns Trump wears Crocs to UN Summit US-Mexico border replaced with bounce houses "Olympic games hosted on a giant floating iceberg.", France renames baguettes “freedom bread” again Ukraine sells captured tanks on eBay Global trade rerouted through Amazon drones Trump auctions Oval Office on eBay "Artificial sun created in basement in Texas." Ukraine replaces tanks with trained bears "Self-driving cars unionize and demand rights.", Kanye West opens church on Mars Stormy Daniels elected Mayor of Vegas Saudi Arabia unveils floating desert embassy Ukraine trades Crimea for Black Sea resort Trump builds golden hotel on Moon "Clouds form funny shapes causing traffic jams.", Biden calls Merkel “Mom” in G20 "Fake moon landing footage accidentally aired again.", Supreme Court rules cats are citizens "Vegans build vegan- only island, ban all burgers.", "Giant inflatable Godzilla sighted in Venice canals.", Putin appears on Dancing With Stars Swedish cows break world escape record Israel elects AI chatbot as president "Secret underground city found inside Mount Everest.", "Fake news creates a new country in Africa.", AI wins Pulitzer Prize for poetry Iran discovers oil under Starbucks location Trump declares Florida independent “Trump Nation” Brazil builds jungle embassy in Antarctica "Mars colony sends first meme back.", Texas secedes, joins NATO instead Palestine recognized by Vatican City esports team China bans exports of sarcasm globally "Ghosts demand rent from haunted house owners.", US Mint issues glittery $3 bill Elon Musk proposes Mars- Israel peace plan "Rain of glitter prompts citywide celebration.", Tom Hanks becomes King of Canada Trump claims Statue of Liberty is fake Senate filibuster broken by kazoo protest "Oreos declare independence from Nabisco.", "Secret society runs for local office on Mars.", CDC recommends hugging goats for health North Korea bans color blue nationwide Germany mandates lederhosen in parliament Fridays "Ancient aliens leave SOS sign in New Mexico desert.", Zelensky stars in Broadway musical “Kyiv!” Zelensky wins Nobel for sarcastic tweet "Worldwide shortage of invisible ink causes chaos.", China launches TikTok- controlled moon rover "Giant flying pineapple lands in London’s Tower Hill.", North Korea offers peace for pizza rolls Putin opens McDonald’s- themed peace summit Israeli PM replaced by Shakira impersonator Alex Jones arrested for moon landing UN sanctions Belarus for bad vibes "Smart sofas refuse to get up, start rebellion.", Jeff Bezos builds underwater Amazon city Taylor Swift’s cat wins Senate seat "Leprechauns organize worldwide treasure hunt.", "Wizards compete in official spelling bee.", EU mandates nap time in parliament Elon Musk launches Dogecoin- only Mars mission Taylor Swift mediates Israel- Palestine talks Dennis Rodman negotiates alien peace treaty Rudy Giuliani opens vampire- themed steakhouse China claims moon in surprise TikTok Kamala Harris challenges Elon Musk to duel North Korea joins Paris Fashion Week Switzerland votes to invade Liechtenstein “for fun” "Carrots start a protest for better soil treatment.", "Trump starts reality TV, declares presidency.", "Dinosaur skeleton wallet stolen from museum.", Wal-Mart recalls radioactive shrimp (again) "Cows form union for better field conditions.", "Humans accidentally clone ancient woolly mammoth’s sweater.", "World’s largest rubber duck declared a sovereign nation.", "Elon Musk announces AI pet dinosaur.", Jeff Goldblum discovers lost city under Arby’s "Panda protests for better bamboo rights.", Turkey pays EU in doner kebabs Ukraine exports snowball weapons to Finland "Bigfoot spotted grocery shopping in Ohio.", "UFO claims diplomatic immunity from NASA.", Australia trades uranium for French cheese "Aliens demand rights during UN meeting.", "Fake viral meme causes stock market to crash.", Congress renames Tuesday “Freedom Ham Day” "Talking parrots run for mayor in Florida.", Canada mistakenly invades Wisconsin during drill Lady Gaga knighted by King Charles Zelensky moonwalks into NATO press conference Putin wins judo match against robot Oprah buys Twitter, bans all politicians Israel legalizes teleportation for military use Beyoncé replaces Lincoln on penny design Zuckerberg unveils mind-reading Meta contacts "Time traveler forgets keys in 2024, causes chaos.", Dwayne Johnson becomes head of NATO Iran blames inflation on Western emojis UN holds peace talks inside IKEA NATO summit invaded by wild peacocks "Subway stations renamed after famous memes.", US-China tariff dispute ends in karaoke "Nuclear- powered bicycle races held in Switzerland.", Florida bans clouds for hurricane season World leaders compete in Mario Kart Rudy Giuliani bitten by emotional support bat Trump pardons himself via skywriting plane "Cats demand equal rights in human government.", Biden accidentally tweets nuclear launch codes India launches “No Meetings Mondays” global treaty "Nuclear toaster causes nationwide panic.", UK sells Buckingham Palace to Jeff Bezos "Martians open interplanetary yoga studio.", Russia accidentally sanctions itself, blames hackers Russian oligarch buys entire Swiss village Gaza ceasefire brokered by K-pop band Bernie Sanders starts punk rock band NASA reveals Saturn smells like Axe Trump paints Mount Rushmore with Sharpie Netflix airs 24/7 Joe Rogan channel Poland bans Excel after “data trauma” Russia trades oil for Taylor Swift tickets Global summit held entirely on Discord "Hologram Elvis performs at Glastonbury Festival.", Yemen declares national llama appreciation day "Dogs hold secret puppet show for humans.", "Weather forecast predicts raining chocolate chips.", "Holographic pizza becomes the new currency.", Putin records EDM album for diplomacy "Aliens buy all Earth’s seaside properties.", UN declares pizza a global currency "Weather app predicts daily weather based on mood.", Beyoncé buys entire island of Malta NATO accepts Antarctica as member state "Penguins spotted taking over Miami Beach.", "Global cheese shortage triggers riot in France.", NASA confirms moon filled with cheese Global South forms anti-G7 boy band Kim Kardashian wins Nobel Peace Prize Congress debates outlawing pineapple on pizza Trump declares war on New Jersey Pope live- streams Fortnite tournament fundraiser Israel- Palestine truce signed on Minecraft server "Lizard people announce new government in secret.", Greta Thunberg powers Iceland with frowns Trump wears Crocs to UN Summit US-Mexico border replaced with bounce houses "Olympic games hosted on a giant floating iceberg.", France renames baguettes “freedom bread” again Ukraine sells captured tanks on eBay Global trade rerouted through Amazon drones Trump auctions Oval Office on eBay "Artificial sun created in basement in Texas." Ukraine replaces tanks with trained bears "Self-driving cars unionize and demand rights.", Kanye West opens church on Mars Stormy Daniels elected Mayor of Vegas Saudi Arabia unveils floating desert embassy Ukraine trades Crimea for Black Sea resort Trump builds golden hotel on Moon "Clouds form funny shapes causing traffic jams.", Biden calls Merkel “Mom” in G20 "Fake moon landing footage accidentally aired again.", Supreme Court rules cats are citizens "Vegans build vegan- only island, ban all burgers.", "Giant inflatable Godzilla sighted in Venice canals.", Putin appears on Dancing With Stars Swedish cows break world escape record Israel elects AI chatbot as president "Secret underground city found inside Mount Everest.", "Fake news creates a new country in Africa.", AI wins Pulitzer Prize for poetry Iran discovers oil under Starbucks location Trump declares Florida independent “Trump Nation” Brazil builds jungle embassy in Antarctica "Mars colony sends first meme back.", Texas secedes, joins NATO instead Palestine recognized by Vatican City esports team China bans exports of sarcasm globally "Ghosts demand rent from haunted house owners.", US Mint issues glittery $3 bill Elon Musk proposes Mars- Israel peace plan "Rain of glitter prompts citywide celebration.", Tom Hanks becomes King of Canada Trump claims Statue of Liberty is fake Senate filibuster broken by kazoo protest "Oreos declare independence from Nabisco.", "Secret society runs for local office on Mars.", CDC recommends hugging goats for health North Korea bans color blue nationwide Germany mandates lederhosen in parliament Fridays "Ancient aliens leave SOS sign in New Mexico desert.", Zelensky stars in Broadway musical “Kyiv!” Zelensky wins Nobel for sarcastic tweet "Worldwide shortage of invisible ink causes chaos.", China launches TikTok- controlled moon rover "Giant flying pineapple lands in London’s Tower Hill.", North Korea offers peace for pizza rolls Putin opens McDonald’s- themed peace summit Israeli PM replaced by Shakira impersonator Alex Jones arrested for moon landing UN sanctions Belarus for bad vibes "Smart sofas refuse to get up, start rebellion.", Jeff Bezos builds underwater Amazon city Taylor Swift’s cat wins Senate seat "Leprechauns organize worldwide treasure hunt.", "Wizards compete in official spelling bee.", EU mandates nap time in parliament Elon Musk launches Dogecoin- only Mars mission Taylor Swift mediates Israel- Palestine talks Dennis Rodman negotiates alien peace treaty Rudy Giuliani opens vampire- themed steakhouse China claims moon in surprise TikTok Kamala Harris challenges Elon Musk to duel North Korea joins Paris Fashion Week Switzerland votes to invade Liechtenstein “for fun” "Carrots start a protest for better soil treatment.", "Trump starts reality TV, declares presidency.", "Dinosaur skeleton wallet stolen from museum.", Wal-Mart recalls radioactive shrimp (again) "Cows form union for better field conditions.", "Humans accidentally clone ancient woolly mammoth’s sweater.",
(Print)
"World’s largest rubber duck declared a sovereign nation.",
"Elon Musk announces AI pet dinosaur.",
Jeff Goldblum discovers lost city under Arby’s
"Panda protests for better bamboo rights.",
Turkey pays EU in doner kebabs
Ukraine exports snowball weapons to Finland
"Bigfoot spotted grocery shopping in Ohio.",
"UFO claims diplomatic immunity from NASA.",
Australia trades uranium for French cheese
"Aliens demand rights during UN meeting.",
"Fake viral meme causes stock market to crash.",
Congress renames Tuesday “Freedom Ham Day”
"Talking parrots run for mayor in Florida.",
Canada mistakenly invades Wisconsin during drill
Lady Gaga knighted by King Charles
Zelensky moonwalks into NATO press conference
Putin wins judo match against robot
Oprah buys Twitter, bans all politicians
Israel legalizes teleportation for military use
Beyoncé replaces Lincoln on penny design
Zuckerberg unveils mind-reading Meta contacts
"Time traveler forgets keys in 2024, causes chaos.",
Dwayne Johnson becomes head of NATO
Iran blames inflation on Western emojis
UN holds peace talks inside IKEA
NATO summit invaded by wild peacocks
"Subway stations renamed after famous memes.",
US-China tariff dispute ends in karaoke
"Nuclear-powered bicycle races held in Switzerland.",
Florida bans clouds for hurricane season
World leaders compete in Mario Kart
Rudy Giuliani bitten by emotional support bat
Trump pardons himself via skywriting plane
"Cats demand equal rights in human government.",
Biden accidentally tweets nuclear launch codes
India launches “No Meetings Mondays” global treaty
"Nuclear toaster causes nationwide panic.",
UK sells Buckingham Palace to Jeff Bezos
"Martians open interplanetary yoga studio.",
Russia accidentally sanctions itself, blames hackers
Russian oligarch buys entire Swiss village
Gaza ceasefire brokered by K-pop band
Bernie Sanders starts punk rock band
NASA reveals Saturn smells like Axe
Trump paints Mount Rushmore with Sharpie
Netflix airs 24/7 Joe Rogan channel
Poland bans Excel after “data trauma”
Russia trades oil for Taylor Swift tickets
Global summit held entirely on Discord
"Hologram Elvis performs at Glastonbury Festival.",
Yemen declares national llama appreciation day
"Dogs hold secret puppet show for humans.",
"Weather forecast predicts raining chocolate chips.",
"Holographic pizza becomes the new currency.",
Putin records EDM album for diplomacy
"Aliens buy all Earth’s seaside properties.",
UN declares pizza a global currency
"Weather app predicts daily weather based on mood.",
Beyoncé buys entire island of Malta
NATO accepts Antarctica as member state
"Penguins spotted taking over Miami Beach.",
"Global cheese shortage triggers riot in France.",
NASA confirms moon filled with cheese
Global South forms anti-G7 boy band
Kim Kardashian wins Nobel Peace Prize
Congress debates outlawing pineapple on pizza
Trump declares war on New Jersey
Pope live-streams Fortnite tournament fundraiser
Israel-Palestine truce signed on Minecraft server
"Lizard people announce new government in secret.",
Greta Thunberg powers Iceland with frowns
Trump wears Crocs to UN Summit
US-Mexico border replaced with bounce houses
"Olympic games hosted on a giant floating iceberg.",
France renames baguettes “freedom bread” again
Ukraine sells captured tanks on eBay
Global trade rerouted through Amazon drones
Trump auctions Oval Office on eBay
"Artificial sun created in basement in Texas."
Ukraine replaces tanks with trained bears
"Self-driving cars unionize and demand rights.",
Kanye West opens church on Mars
Stormy Daniels elected Mayor of Vegas
Saudi Arabia unveils floating desert embassy
Ukraine trades Crimea for Black Sea resort
Trump builds golden hotel on Moon
"Clouds form funny shapes causing traffic jams.",
Biden calls Merkel “Mom” in G20
"Fake moon landing footage accidentally aired again.",
Supreme Court rules cats are citizens
"Vegans build vegan-only island, ban all burgers.",
"Giant inflatable Godzilla sighted in Venice canals.",
Putin appears on Dancing With Stars
Swedish cows break world escape record
Israel elects AI chatbot as president
"Secret underground city found inside Mount Everest.",
"Fake news creates a new country in Africa.",
AI wins Pulitzer Prize for poetry
Iran discovers oil under Starbucks location
Trump declares Florida independent “Trump Nation”
Brazil builds jungle embassy in Antarctica
"Mars colony sends first meme back.",
Texas secedes, joins NATO instead
Palestine recognized by Vatican City esports team
China bans exports of sarcasm globally
"Ghosts demand rent from haunted house owners.",
US Mint issues glittery $3 bill
Elon Musk proposes Mars-Israel peace plan
"Rain of glitter prompts citywide celebration.",
Tom Hanks becomes King of Canada
Trump claims Statue of Liberty is fake
Senate filibuster broken by kazoo protest
"Oreos declare independence from Nabisco.",
"Secret society runs for local office on Mars.",
CDC recommends hugging goats for health
North Korea bans color blue nationwide
Germany mandates lederhosen in parliament Fridays
"Ancient aliens leave SOS sign in New Mexico desert.",
Zelensky stars in Broadway musical “Kyiv!”
Zelensky wins Nobel for sarcastic tweet
"Worldwide shortage of invisible ink causes chaos.",
China launches TikTok-controlled moon rover
"Giant flying pineapple lands in London’s Tower Hill.",
North Korea offers peace for pizza rolls
Putin opens McDonald’s-themed peace summit
Israeli PM replaced by Shakira impersonator
Alex Jones arrested for moon landing
UN sanctions Belarus for bad vibes
"Smart sofas refuse to get up, start rebellion.",
Jeff Bezos builds underwater Amazon city
Taylor Swift’s cat wins Senate seat
"Leprechauns organize worldwide treasure hunt.",
"Wizards compete in official spelling bee.",
EU mandates nap time in parliament
Elon Musk launches Dogecoin-only Mars mission
Taylor Swift mediates Israel-Palestine talks
Dennis Rodman negotiates alien peace treaty
Rudy Giuliani opens vampire-themed steakhouse
China claims moon in surprise TikTok
Kamala Harris challenges Elon Musk to duel
North Korea joins Paris Fashion Week
Switzerland votes to invade Liechtenstein “for fun”
"Carrots start a protest for better soil treatment.",
"Trump starts reality TV, declares presidency.",
"Dinosaur skeleton wallet stolen from museum.",
Wal-Mart recalls radioactive shrimp (again)
"Cows form union for better field conditions.",
"Humans accidentally clone ancient woolly mammoth’s sweater.",
