"Global cheese shortage triggers riot in France.", Kim Kardashian wins Nobel Peace Prize Putin records EDM album for diplomacy Russia trades oil for Taylor Swift tickets "Weather forecast predicts raining chocolate chips.", UN sanctions Belarus for bad vibes Dennis Rodman negotiates alien peace treaty Congress renames Tuesday “Freedom Ham Day” Stormy Daniels elected Mayor of Vegas China claims moon in surprise TikTok "Rain of glitter prompts citywide celebration.", "Martians open interplanetary yoga studio.", Russian oligarch buys entire Swiss village Saudi Arabia unveils floating desert embassy North Korea bans color blue nationwide Palestine recognized by Vatican City esports team Taylor Swift’s cat wins Senate seat "Cats demand equal rights in human government.", Israeli PM replaced by Shakira impersonator Brazil builds jungle embassy in Antarctica "Dogs hold secret puppet show for humans.", Trump wears Crocs to UN Summit Trump declares war on New Jersey Elon Musk launches Dogecoin- only Mars mission Florida bans clouds for hurricane season Ukraine exports snowball weapons to Finland Bernie Sanders starts punk rock band "Carrots start a protest for better soil treatment.", "Bigfoot spotted grocery shopping in Ohio.", Ukraine sells captured tanks on eBay "Clouds form funny shapes causing traffic jams.", Switzerland votes to invade Liechtenstein “for fun” Rudy Giuliani opens vampire- themed steakhouse Greta Thunberg powers Iceland with frowns "Fake news creates a new country in Africa.", "Aliens buy all Earth’s seaside properties.", Congress debates outlawing pineapple on pizza India launches “No Meetings Mondays” global treaty "Cows form union for better field conditions.", "Talking parrots run for mayor in Florida.", "Nuclear- powered bicycle races held in Switzerland.", EU mandates nap time in parliament Dwayne Johnson becomes head of NATO Iran blames inflation on Western emojis Iran discovers oil under Starbucks location "Dinosaur skeleton wallet stolen from museum.", Zelensky wins Nobel for sarcastic tweet Global South forms anti-G7 boy band Oprah buys Twitter, bans all politicians Biden accidentally tweets nuclear launch codes Tom Hanks becomes King of Canada Lady Gaga knighted by King Charles Global trade rerouted through Amazon drones Ukraine replaces tanks with trained bears "World’s largest rubber duck declared a sovereign nation.", Putin appears on Dancing With Stars Zelensky moonwalks into NATO press conference Supreme Court rules cats are citizens "Oreos declare independence from Nabisco.", Senate filibuster broken by kazoo protest "Ghosts demand rent from haunted house owners.", Canada mistakenly invades Wisconsin during drill Israel elects AI chatbot as president Beyoncé replaces Lincoln on penny design Israel- Palestine truce signed on Minecraft server Global summit held entirely on Discord "Secret underground city found inside Mount Everest.", NASA confirms moon filled with cheese "Nuclear toaster causes nationwide panic.", "Elon Musk announces AI pet dinosaur.", France renames baguettes “freedom bread” again NATO accepts Antarctica as member state Taylor Swift mediates Israel- Palestine talks Trump declares Florida independent “Trump Nation” "Lizard people announce new government in secret.", US-China tariff dispute ends in karaoke Yemen declares national llama appreciation day "UFO claims diplomatic immunity from NASA.", Rudy Giuliani bitten by emotional support bat Germany mandates lederhosen in parliament Fridays "Wizards compete in official spelling bee.", "Fake viral meme causes stock market to crash.", "Ancient aliens leave SOS sign in New Mexico desert.", "Olympic games hosted on a giant floating iceberg.", Trump auctions Oval Office on eBay Trump pardons himself via skywriting plane NATO summit invaded by wild peacocks Biden calls Merkel “Mom” in G20 Swedish cows break world escape record Russia accidentally sanctions itself, blames hackers Zuckerberg unveils mind-reading Meta contacts "Weather app predicts daily weather based on mood.", Jeff Goldblum discovers lost city under Arby’s Jeff Bezos builds underwater Amazon city Zelensky stars in Broadway musical “Kyiv!” World leaders compete in Mario Kart Israel legalizes teleportation for military use Trump claims Statue of Liberty is fake North Korea offers peace for pizza rolls Pope live- streams Fortnite tournament fundraiser Texas secedes, joins NATO instead "Humans accidentally clone ancient woolly mammoth’s sweater.", "Giant flying pineapple lands in London’s Tower Hill.", Elon Musk proposes Mars- Israel peace plan "Giant inflatable Godzilla sighted in Venice canals.", "Smart sofas refuse to get up, start rebellion.", Wal-Mart recalls radioactive shrimp (again) UN holds peace talks inside IKEA CDC recommends hugging goats for health Australia trades uranium for French cheese Turkey pays EU in doner kebabs "Leprechauns organize worldwide treasure hunt.", "Penguins spotted taking over Miami Beach.", Kamala Harris challenges Elon Musk to duel Putin opens McDonald’s- themed peace summit AI wins Pulitzer Prize for poetry Netflix airs 24/7 Joe Rogan channel Poland bans Excel after “data trauma” "Hologram Elvis performs at Glastonbury Festival.", "Time traveler forgets keys in 2024, causes chaos.", US Mint issues glittery $3 bill China launches TikTok- controlled moon rover "Subway stations renamed after famous memes.", UN declares pizza a global currency "Worldwide shortage of invisible ink causes chaos.", UK sells Buckingham Palace to Jeff Bezos "Mars colony sends first meme back.", "Vegans build vegan- only island, ban all burgers.", "Panda protests for better bamboo rights.", North Korea joins Paris Fashion Week NASA reveals Saturn smells like Axe Gaza ceasefire brokered by K-pop band Beyoncé buys entire island of Malta China bans exports of sarcasm globally "Self-driving cars unionize and demand rights.", "Holographic pizza becomes the new currency.", "Aliens demand rights during UN meeting.", "Secret society runs for local office on Mars.", Trump builds golden hotel on Moon Trump paints Mount Rushmore with Sharpie "Fake moon landing footage accidentally aired again.", Alex Jones arrested for moon landing Putin wins judo match against robot "Artificial sun created in basement in Texas." Ukraine trades Crimea for Black Sea resort Kanye West opens church on Mars "Trump starts reality TV, declares presidency.", US-Mexico border replaced with bounce houses "Global cheese shortage triggers riot in France.", Kim Kardashian wins Nobel Peace Prize Putin records EDM album for diplomacy Russia trades oil for Taylor Swift tickets "Weather forecast predicts raining chocolate chips.", UN sanctions Belarus for bad vibes Dennis Rodman negotiates alien peace treaty Congress renames Tuesday “Freedom Ham Day” Stormy Daniels elected Mayor of Vegas China claims moon in surprise TikTok "Rain of glitter prompts citywide celebration.", "Martians open interplanetary yoga studio.", Russian oligarch buys entire Swiss village Saudi Arabia unveils floating desert embassy North Korea bans color blue nationwide Palestine recognized by Vatican City esports team Taylor Swift’s cat wins Senate seat "Cats demand equal rights in human government.", Israeli PM replaced by Shakira impersonator Brazil builds jungle embassy in Antarctica "Dogs hold secret puppet show for humans.", Trump wears Crocs to UN Summit Trump declares war on New Jersey Elon Musk launches Dogecoin- only Mars mission Florida bans clouds for hurricane season Ukraine exports snowball weapons to Finland Bernie Sanders starts punk rock band "Carrots start a protest for better soil treatment.", "Bigfoot spotted grocery shopping in Ohio.", Ukraine sells captured tanks on eBay "Clouds form funny shapes causing traffic jams.", Switzerland votes to invade Liechtenstein “for fun” Rudy Giuliani opens vampire- themed steakhouse Greta Thunberg powers Iceland with frowns "Fake news creates a new country in Africa.", "Aliens buy all Earth’s seaside properties.", Congress debates outlawing pineapple on pizza India launches “No Meetings Mondays” global treaty "Cows form union for better field conditions.", "Talking parrots run for mayor in Florida.", "Nuclear- powered bicycle races held in Switzerland.", EU mandates nap time in parliament Dwayne Johnson becomes head of NATO Iran blames inflation on Western emojis Iran discovers oil under Starbucks location "Dinosaur skeleton wallet stolen from museum.", Zelensky wins Nobel for sarcastic tweet Global South forms anti-G7 boy band Oprah buys Twitter, bans all politicians Biden accidentally tweets nuclear launch codes Tom Hanks becomes King of Canada Lady Gaga knighted by King Charles Global trade rerouted through Amazon drones Ukraine replaces tanks with trained bears "World’s largest rubber duck declared a sovereign nation.", Putin appears on Dancing With Stars Zelensky moonwalks into NATO press conference Supreme Court rules cats are citizens "Oreos declare independence from Nabisco.", Senate filibuster broken by kazoo protest "Ghosts demand rent from haunted house owners.", Canada mistakenly invades Wisconsin during drill Israel elects AI chatbot as president Beyoncé replaces Lincoln on penny design Israel- Palestine truce signed on Minecraft server Global summit held entirely on Discord "Secret underground city found inside Mount Everest.", NASA confirms moon filled with cheese "Nuclear toaster causes nationwide panic.", "Elon Musk announces AI pet dinosaur.", France renames baguettes “freedom bread” again NATO accepts Antarctica as member state Taylor Swift mediates Israel- Palestine talks Trump declares Florida independent “Trump Nation” "Lizard people announce new government in secret.", US-China tariff dispute ends in karaoke Yemen declares national llama appreciation day "UFO claims diplomatic immunity from NASA.", Rudy Giuliani bitten by emotional support bat Germany mandates lederhosen in parliament Fridays "Wizards compete in official spelling bee.", "Fake viral meme causes stock market to crash.", "Ancient aliens leave SOS sign in New Mexico desert.", "Olympic games hosted on a giant floating iceberg.", Trump auctions Oval Office on eBay Trump pardons himself via skywriting plane NATO summit invaded by wild peacocks Biden calls Merkel “Mom” in G20 Swedish cows break world escape record Russia accidentally sanctions itself, blames hackers Zuckerberg unveils mind-reading Meta contacts "Weather app predicts daily weather based on mood.", Jeff Goldblum discovers lost city under Arby’s Jeff Bezos builds underwater Amazon city Zelensky stars in Broadway musical “Kyiv!” World leaders compete in Mario Kart Israel legalizes teleportation for military use Trump claims Statue of Liberty is fake North Korea offers peace for pizza rolls Pope live- streams Fortnite tournament fundraiser Texas secedes, joins NATO instead "Humans accidentally clone ancient woolly mammoth’s sweater.", "Giant flying pineapple lands in London’s Tower Hill.", Elon Musk proposes Mars- Israel peace plan "Giant inflatable Godzilla sighted in Venice canals.", "Smart sofas refuse to get up, start rebellion.", Wal-Mart recalls radioactive shrimp (again) UN holds peace talks inside IKEA CDC recommends hugging goats for health Australia trades uranium for French cheese Turkey pays EU in doner kebabs "Leprechauns organize worldwide treasure hunt.", "Penguins spotted taking over Miami Beach.", Kamala Harris challenges Elon Musk to duel Putin opens McDonald’s- themed peace summit AI wins Pulitzer Prize for poetry Netflix airs 24/7 Joe Rogan channel Poland bans Excel after “data trauma” "Hologram Elvis performs at Glastonbury Festival.", "Time traveler forgets keys in 2024, causes chaos.", US Mint issues glittery $3 bill China launches TikTok- controlled moon rover "Subway stations renamed after famous memes.", UN declares pizza a global currency "Worldwide shortage of invisible ink causes chaos.", UK sells Buckingham Palace to Jeff Bezos "Mars colony sends first meme back.", "Vegans build vegan- only island, ban all burgers.", "Panda protests for better bamboo rights.", North Korea joins Paris Fashion Week NASA reveals Saturn smells like Axe Gaza ceasefire brokered by K-pop band Beyoncé buys entire island of Malta China bans exports of sarcasm globally "Self-driving cars unionize and demand rights.", "Holographic pizza becomes the new currency.", "Aliens demand rights during UN meeting.", "Secret society runs for local office on Mars.", Trump builds golden hotel on Moon Trump paints Mount Rushmore with Sharpie "Fake moon landing footage accidentally aired again.", Alex Jones arrested for moon landing Putin wins judo match against robot "Artificial sun created in basement in Texas." Ukraine trades Crimea for Black Sea resort Kanye West opens church on Mars "Trump starts reality TV, declares presidency.", US-Mexico border replaced with bounce houses
(Print)
"Global cheese shortage triggers riot in France.",
Kim Kardashian wins Nobel Peace Prize
Putin records EDM album for diplomacy
Russia trades oil for Taylor Swift tickets
"Weather forecast predicts raining chocolate chips.",
UN sanctions Belarus for bad vibes
Dennis Rodman negotiates alien peace treaty
Congress renames Tuesday “Freedom Ham Day”
Stormy Daniels elected Mayor of Vegas
China claims moon in surprise TikTok
"Rain of glitter prompts citywide celebration.",
"Martians open interplanetary yoga studio.",
Russian oligarch buys entire Swiss village
Saudi Arabia unveils floating desert embassy
North Korea bans color blue nationwide
Palestine recognized by Vatican City esports team
Taylor Swift’s cat wins Senate seat
"Cats demand equal rights in human government.",
Israeli PM replaced by Shakira impersonator
Brazil builds jungle embassy in Antarctica
"Dogs hold secret puppet show for humans.",
Trump wears Crocs to UN Summit
Trump declares war on New Jersey
Elon Musk launches Dogecoin-only Mars mission
Florida bans clouds for hurricane season
Ukraine exports snowball weapons to Finland
Bernie Sanders starts punk rock band
"Carrots start a protest for better soil treatment.",
"Bigfoot spotted grocery shopping in Ohio.",
Ukraine sells captured tanks on eBay
"Clouds form funny shapes causing traffic jams.",
Switzerland votes to invade Liechtenstein “for fun”
Rudy Giuliani opens vampire-themed steakhouse
Greta Thunberg powers Iceland with frowns
"Fake news creates a new country in Africa.",
"Aliens buy all Earth’s seaside properties.",
Congress debates outlawing pineapple on pizza
India launches “No Meetings Mondays” global treaty
"Cows form union for better field conditions.",
"Talking parrots run for mayor in Florida.",
"Nuclear-powered bicycle races held in Switzerland.",
EU mandates nap time in parliament
Dwayne Johnson becomes head of NATO
Iran blames inflation on Western emojis
Iran discovers oil under Starbucks location
"Dinosaur skeleton wallet stolen from museum.",
Zelensky wins Nobel for sarcastic tweet
Global South forms anti-G7 boy band
Oprah buys Twitter, bans all politicians
Biden accidentally tweets nuclear launch codes
Tom Hanks becomes King of Canada
Lady Gaga knighted by King Charles
Global trade rerouted through Amazon drones
Ukraine replaces tanks with trained bears
"World’s largest rubber duck declared a sovereign nation.",
Putin appears on Dancing With Stars
Zelensky moonwalks into NATO press conference
Supreme Court rules cats are citizens
"Oreos declare independence from Nabisco.",
Senate filibuster broken by kazoo protest
"Ghosts demand rent from haunted house owners.",
Canada mistakenly invades Wisconsin during drill
Israel elects AI chatbot as president
Beyoncé replaces Lincoln on penny design
Israel-Palestine truce signed on Minecraft server
Global summit held entirely on Discord
"Secret underground city found inside Mount Everest.",
NASA confirms moon filled with cheese
"Nuclear toaster causes nationwide panic.",
"Elon Musk announces AI pet dinosaur.",
France renames baguettes “freedom bread” again
NATO accepts Antarctica as member state
Taylor Swift mediates Israel-Palestine talks
Trump declares Florida independent “Trump Nation”
"Lizard people announce new government in secret.",
US-China tariff dispute ends in karaoke
Yemen declares national llama appreciation day
"UFO claims diplomatic immunity from NASA.",
Rudy Giuliani bitten by emotional support bat
Germany mandates lederhosen in parliament Fridays
"Wizards compete in official spelling bee.",
"Fake viral meme causes stock market to crash.",
"Ancient aliens leave SOS sign in New Mexico desert.",
"Olympic games hosted on a giant floating iceberg.",
Trump auctions Oval Office on eBay
Trump pardons himself via skywriting plane
NATO summit invaded by wild peacocks
Biden calls Merkel “Mom” in G20
Swedish cows break world escape record
Russia accidentally sanctions itself, blames hackers
Zuckerberg unveils mind-reading Meta contacts
"Weather app predicts daily weather based on mood.",
Jeff Goldblum discovers lost city under Arby’s
Jeff Bezos builds underwater Amazon city
Zelensky stars in Broadway musical “Kyiv!”
World leaders compete in Mario Kart
Israel legalizes teleportation for military use
Trump claims Statue of Liberty is fake
North Korea offers peace for pizza rolls
Pope live-streams Fortnite tournament fundraiser
Texas secedes, joins NATO instead
"Humans accidentally clone ancient woolly mammoth’s sweater.",
"Giant flying pineapple lands in London’s Tower Hill.",
Elon Musk proposes Mars-Israel peace plan
"Giant inflatable Godzilla sighted in Venice canals.",
"Smart sofas refuse to get up, start rebellion.",
Wal-Mart recalls radioactive shrimp (again)
UN holds peace talks inside IKEA
CDC recommends hugging goats for health
Australia trades uranium for French cheese
Turkey pays EU in doner kebabs
"Leprechauns organize worldwide treasure hunt.",
"Penguins spotted taking over Miami Beach.",
Kamala Harris challenges Elon Musk to duel
Putin opens McDonald’s-themed peace summit
AI wins Pulitzer Prize for poetry
Netflix airs 24/7 Joe Rogan channel
Poland bans Excel after “data trauma”
"Hologram Elvis performs at Glastonbury Festival.",
"Time traveler forgets keys in 2024, causes chaos.",
US Mint issues glittery $3 bill
China launches TikTok-controlled moon rover
"Subway stations renamed after famous memes.",
UN declares pizza a global currency
"Worldwide shortage of invisible ink causes chaos.",
UK sells Buckingham Palace to Jeff Bezos
"Mars colony sends first meme back.",
"Vegans build vegan-only island, ban all burgers.",
"Panda protests for better bamboo rights.",
North Korea joins Paris Fashion Week
NASA reveals Saturn smells like Axe
Gaza ceasefire brokered by K-pop band
Beyoncé buys entire island of Malta
China bans exports of sarcasm globally
"Self-driving cars unionize and demand rights.",
"Holographic pizza becomes the new currency.",
"Aliens demand rights during UN meeting.",
"Secret society runs for local office on Mars.",
Trump builds golden hotel on Moon
Trump paints Mount Rushmore with Sharpie
"Fake moon landing footage accidentally aired again.",
Alex Jones arrested for moon landing
Putin wins judo match against robot
"Artificial sun created in basement in Texas."
Ukraine trades Crimea for Black Sea resort
Kanye West opens church on Mars
"Trump starts reality TV, declares presidency.",
US-Mexico border replaced with bounce houses
