Trump declares Florida independent “Trump Nation” "Martians open interplanetary yoga studio.", Canada mistakenly invades Wisconsin during drill "Secret society runs for local office on Mars.", Switzerland votes to invade Liechtenstein “for fun” US Mint issues glittery $3 bill "Nuclear toaster causes nationwide panic.", "Mars colony sends first meme back.", Kamala Harris challenges Elon Musk to duel "Aliens buy all Earth’s seaside properties.", "Dogs hold secret puppet show for humans.", Palestine recognized by Vatican City esports team US-Mexico border replaced with bounce houses Australia trades uranium for French cheese Elon Musk proposes Mars- Israel peace plan Zelensky stars in Broadway musical “Kyiv!” US-China tariff dispute ends in karaoke Global South forms anti-G7 boy band Trump pardons himself via skywriting plane "Time traveler forgets keys in 2024, causes chaos.", "Rain of glitter prompts citywide celebration.", Senate filibuster broken by kazoo protest Alex Jones arrested for moon landing France renames baguettes “freedom bread” again "Hologram Elvis performs at Glastonbury Festival.", Texas secedes, joins NATO instead Jeff Goldblum discovers lost city under Arby’s "Giant flying pineapple lands in London’s Tower Hill.", China claims moon in surprise TikTok UN declares pizza a global currency Congress debates outlawing pineapple on pizza Iran blames inflation on Western emojis Elon Musk launches Dogecoin- only Mars mission Bernie Sanders starts punk rock band Yemen declares national llama appreciation day Taylor Swift mediates Israel- Palestine talks Trump auctions Oval Office on eBay UK sells Buckingham Palace to Jeff Bezos "Dinosaur skeleton wallet stolen from museum.", NASA confirms moon filled with cheese NATO accepts Antarctica as member state Taylor Swift’s cat wins Senate seat "Olympic games hosted on a giant floating iceberg.", "Subway stations renamed after famous memes.", Israel legalizes teleportation for military use Pope live- streams Fortnite tournament fundraiser "Giant inflatable Godzilla sighted in Venice canals.", Turkey pays EU in doner kebabs Trump declares war on New Jersey "Carrots start a protest for better soil treatment.", Rudy Giuliani bitten by emotional support bat "Wizards compete in official spelling bee.", Global summit held entirely on Discord Florida bans clouds for hurricane season "Nuclear- powered bicycle races held in Switzerland.", EU mandates nap time in parliament "Humans accidentally clone ancient woolly mammoth’s sweater.", "Smart sofas refuse to get up, start rebellion.", Biden accidentally tweets nuclear launch codes "World’s largest rubber duck declared a sovereign nation.", "Cats demand equal rights in human government.", "Leprechauns organize worldwide treasure hunt.", Global trade rerouted through Amazon drones Putin opens McDonald’s- themed peace summit "Talking parrots run for mayor in Florida.", "Weather forecast predicts raining chocolate chips.", "Lizard people announce new government in secret.", Putin appears on Dancing With Stars "Global cheese shortage triggers riot in France.", China bans exports of sarcasm globally Russia accidentally sanctions itself, blames hackers NATO summit invaded by wild peacocks Kim Kardashian wins Nobel Peace Prize "Panda protests for better bamboo rights.", "Self-driving cars unionize and demand rights.", North Korea offers peace for pizza rolls "Cows form union for better field conditions.", Swedish cows break world escape record NASA reveals Saturn smells like Axe Ukraine sells captured tanks on eBay Stormy Daniels elected Mayor of Vegas Germany mandates lederhosen in parliament Fridays "Trump starts reality TV, declares presidency.", Russia trades oil for Taylor Swift tickets "Fake viral meme causes stock market to crash.", Gaza ceasefire brokered by K-pop band "Penguins spotted taking over Miami Beach.", "Holographic pizza becomes the new currency.", Wal-Mart recalls radioactive shrimp (again) UN sanctions Belarus for bad vibes Putin records EDM album for diplomacy India launches “No Meetings Mondays” global treaty Zelensky moonwalks into NATO press conference Israel- Palestine truce signed on Minecraft server Ukraine exports snowball weapons to Finland Biden calls Merkel “Mom” in G20 Oprah buys Twitter, bans all politicians China launches TikTok- controlled moon rover Ukraine replaces tanks with trained bears CDC recommends hugging goats for health Jeff Bezos builds underwater Amazon city Russian oligarch buys entire Swiss village Netflix airs 24/7 Joe Rogan channel "UFO claims diplomatic immunity from NASA.", Tom Hanks becomes King of Canada Israeli PM replaced by Shakira impersonator "Ancient aliens leave SOS sign in New Mexico desert.", World leaders compete in Mario Kart North Korea bans color blue nationwide Trump builds golden hotel on Moon Iran discovers oil under Starbucks location Israel elects AI chatbot as president Ukraine trades Crimea for Black Sea resort Zuckerberg unveils mind-reading Meta contacts "Ghosts demand rent from haunted house owners.", "Artificial sun created in basement in Texas." Congress renames Tuesday “Freedom Ham Day” Rudy Giuliani opens vampire- themed steakhouse North Korea joins Paris Fashion Week "Worldwide shortage of invisible ink causes chaos.", Brazil builds jungle embassy in Antarctica AI wins Pulitzer Prize for poetry "Oreos declare independence from Nabisco.", Kanye West opens church on Mars "Vegans build vegan- only island, ban all burgers.", "Clouds form funny shapes causing traffic jams.", Beyoncé replaces Lincoln on penny design Dwayne Johnson becomes head of NATO "Fake moon landing footage accidentally aired again.", Poland bans Excel after “data trauma” Trump paints Mount Rushmore with Sharpie Putin wins judo match against robot Dennis Rodman negotiates alien peace treaty Beyoncé buys entire island of Malta "Weather app predicts daily weather based on mood.", UN holds peace talks inside IKEA Zelensky wins Nobel for sarcastic tweet Trump claims Statue of Liberty is fake "Secret underground city found inside Mount Everest.", "Fake news creates a new country in Africa.", "Aliens demand rights during UN meeting.", "Bigfoot spotted grocery shopping in Ohio.", Greta Thunberg powers Iceland with frowns Supreme Court rules cats are citizens Lady Gaga knighted by King Charles Trump wears Crocs to UN Summit Saudi Arabia unveils floating desert embassy "Elon Musk announces AI pet dinosaur.", Trump declares Florida independent “Trump Nation” "Martians open interplanetary yoga studio.", Canada mistakenly invades Wisconsin during drill "Secret society runs for local office on Mars.", Switzerland votes to invade Liechtenstein “for fun” US Mint issues glittery $3 bill "Nuclear toaster causes nationwide panic.", "Mars colony sends first meme back.", Kamala Harris challenges Elon Musk to duel "Aliens buy all Earth’s seaside properties.", "Dogs hold secret puppet show for humans.", Palestine recognized by Vatican City esports team US-Mexico border replaced with bounce houses Australia trades uranium for French cheese Elon Musk proposes Mars- Israel peace plan Zelensky stars in Broadway musical “Kyiv!” US-China tariff dispute ends in karaoke Global South forms anti-G7 boy band Trump pardons himself via skywriting plane "Time traveler forgets keys in 2024, causes chaos.", "Rain of glitter prompts citywide celebration.", Senate filibuster broken by kazoo protest Alex Jones arrested for moon landing France renames baguettes “freedom bread” again "Hologram Elvis performs at Glastonbury Festival.", Texas secedes, joins NATO instead Jeff Goldblum discovers lost city under Arby’s "Giant flying pineapple lands in London’s Tower Hill.", China claims moon in surprise TikTok UN declares pizza a global currency Congress debates outlawing pineapple on pizza Iran blames inflation on Western emojis Elon Musk launches Dogecoin- only Mars mission Bernie Sanders starts punk rock band Yemen declares national llama appreciation day Taylor Swift mediates Israel- Palestine talks Trump auctions Oval Office on eBay UK sells Buckingham Palace to Jeff Bezos "Dinosaur skeleton wallet stolen from museum.", NASA confirms moon filled with cheese NATO accepts Antarctica as member state Taylor Swift’s cat wins Senate seat "Olympic games hosted on a giant floating iceberg.", "Subway stations renamed after famous memes.", Israel legalizes teleportation for military use Pope live- streams Fortnite tournament fundraiser "Giant inflatable Godzilla sighted in Venice canals.", Turkey pays EU in doner kebabs Trump declares war on New Jersey "Carrots start a protest for better soil treatment.", Rudy Giuliani bitten by emotional support bat "Wizards compete in official spelling bee.", Global summit held entirely on Discord Florida bans clouds for hurricane season "Nuclear- powered bicycle races held in Switzerland.", EU mandates nap time in parliament "Humans accidentally clone ancient woolly mammoth’s sweater.", "Smart sofas refuse to get up, start rebellion.", Biden accidentally tweets nuclear launch codes "World’s largest rubber duck declared a sovereign nation.", "Cats demand equal rights in human government.", "Leprechauns organize worldwide treasure hunt.", Global trade rerouted through Amazon drones Putin opens McDonald’s- themed peace summit "Talking parrots run for mayor in Florida.", "Weather forecast predicts raining chocolate chips.", "Lizard people announce new government in secret.", Putin appears on Dancing With Stars "Global cheese shortage triggers riot in France.", China bans exports of sarcasm globally Russia accidentally sanctions itself, blames hackers NATO summit invaded by wild peacocks Kim Kardashian wins Nobel Peace Prize "Panda protests for better bamboo rights.", "Self-driving cars unionize and demand rights.", North Korea offers peace for pizza rolls "Cows form union for better field conditions.", Swedish cows break world escape record NASA reveals Saturn smells like Axe Ukraine sells captured tanks on eBay Stormy Daniels elected Mayor of Vegas Germany mandates lederhosen in parliament Fridays "Trump starts reality TV, declares presidency.", Russia trades oil for Taylor Swift tickets "Fake viral meme causes stock market to crash.", Gaza ceasefire brokered by K-pop band "Penguins spotted taking over Miami Beach.", "Holographic pizza becomes the new currency.", Wal-Mart recalls radioactive shrimp (again) UN sanctions Belarus for bad vibes Putin records EDM album for diplomacy India launches “No Meetings Mondays” global treaty Zelensky moonwalks into NATO press conference Israel- Palestine truce signed on Minecraft server Ukraine exports snowball weapons to Finland Biden calls Merkel “Mom” in G20 Oprah buys Twitter, bans all politicians China launches TikTok- controlled moon rover Ukraine replaces tanks with trained bears CDC recommends hugging goats for health Jeff Bezos builds underwater Amazon city Russian oligarch buys entire Swiss village Netflix airs 24/7 Joe Rogan channel "UFO claims diplomatic immunity from NASA.", Tom Hanks becomes King of Canada Israeli PM replaced by Shakira impersonator "Ancient aliens leave SOS sign in New Mexico desert.", World leaders compete in Mario Kart North Korea bans color blue nationwide Trump builds golden hotel on Moon Iran discovers oil under Starbucks location Israel elects AI chatbot as president Ukraine trades Crimea for Black Sea resort Zuckerberg unveils mind-reading Meta contacts "Ghosts demand rent from haunted house owners.", "Artificial sun created in basement in Texas." Congress renames Tuesday “Freedom Ham Day” Rudy Giuliani opens vampire- themed steakhouse North Korea joins Paris Fashion Week "Worldwide shortage of invisible ink causes chaos.", Brazil builds jungle embassy in Antarctica AI wins Pulitzer Prize for poetry "Oreos declare independence from Nabisco.", Kanye West opens church on Mars "Vegans build vegan- only island, ban all burgers.", "Clouds form funny shapes causing traffic jams.", Beyoncé replaces Lincoln on penny design Dwayne Johnson becomes head of NATO "Fake moon landing footage accidentally aired again.", Poland bans Excel after “data trauma” Trump paints Mount Rushmore with Sharpie Putin wins judo match against robot Dennis Rodman negotiates alien peace treaty Beyoncé buys entire island of Malta "Weather app predicts daily weather based on mood.", UN holds peace talks inside IKEA Zelensky wins Nobel for sarcastic tweet Trump claims Statue of Liberty is fake "Secret underground city found inside Mount Everest.", "Fake news creates a new country in Africa.", "Aliens demand rights during UN meeting.", "Bigfoot spotted grocery shopping in Ohio.", Greta Thunberg powers Iceland with frowns Supreme Court rules cats are citizens Lady Gaga knighted by King Charles Trump wears Crocs to UN Summit Saudi Arabia unveils floating desert embassy "Elon Musk announces AI pet dinosaur.",
(Print)
Trump declares Florida independent “Trump Nation”
"Martians open interplanetary yoga studio.",
Canada mistakenly invades Wisconsin during drill
"Secret society runs for local office on Mars.",
Switzerland votes to invade Liechtenstein “for fun”
US Mint issues glittery $3 bill
"Nuclear toaster causes nationwide panic.",
"Mars colony sends first meme back.",
Kamala Harris challenges Elon Musk to duel
"Aliens buy all Earth’s seaside properties.",
"Dogs hold secret puppet show for humans.",
Palestine recognized by Vatican City esports team
US-Mexico border replaced with bounce houses
Australia trades uranium for French cheese
Elon Musk proposes Mars-Israel peace plan
Zelensky stars in Broadway musical “Kyiv!”
US-China tariff dispute ends in karaoke
Global South forms anti-G7 boy band
Trump pardons himself via skywriting plane
"Time traveler forgets keys in 2024, causes chaos.",
"Rain of glitter prompts citywide celebration.",
Senate filibuster broken by kazoo protest
Alex Jones arrested for moon landing
France renames baguettes “freedom bread” again
"Hologram Elvis performs at Glastonbury Festival.",
Texas secedes, joins NATO instead
Jeff Goldblum discovers lost city under Arby’s
"Giant flying pineapple lands in London’s Tower Hill.",
China claims moon in surprise TikTok
UN declares pizza a global currency
Congress debates outlawing pineapple on pizza
Iran blames inflation on Western emojis
Elon Musk launches Dogecoin-only Mars mission
Bernie Sanders starts punk rock band
Yemen declares national llama appreciation day
Taylor Swift mediates Israel-Palestine talks
Trump auctions Oval Office on eBay
UK sells Buckingham Palace to Jeff Bezos
"Dinosaur skeleton wallet stolen from museum.",
NASA confirms moon filled with cheese
NATO accepts Antarctica as member state
Taylor Swift’s cat wins Senate seat
"Olympic games hosted on a giant floating iceberg.",
"Subway stations renamed after famous memes.",
Israel legalizes teleportation for military use
Pope live-streams Fortnite tournament fundraiser
"Giant inflatable Godzilla sighted in Venice canals.",
Turkey pays EU in doner kebabs
Trump declares war on New Jersey
"Carrots start a protest for better soil treatment.",
Rudy Giuliani bitten by emotional support bat
"Wizards compete in official spelling bee.",
Global summit held entirely on Discord
Florida bans clouds for hurricane season
"Nuclear-powered bicycle races held in Switzerland.",
EU mandates nap time in parliament
"Humans accidentally clone ancient woolly mammoth’s sweater.",
"Smart sofas refuse to get up, start rebellion.",
Biden accidentally tweets nuclear launch codes
"World’s largest rubber duck declared a sovereign nation.",
"Cats demand equal rights in human government.",
"Leprechauns organize worldwide treasure hunt.",
Global trade rerouted through Amazon drones
Putin opens McDonald’s-themed peace summit
"Talking parrots run for mayor in Florida.",
"Weather forecast predicts raining chocolate chips.",
"Lizard people announce new government in secret.",
Putin appears on Dancing With Stars
"Global cheese shortage triggers riot in France.",
China bans exports of sarcasm globally
Russia accidentally sanctions itself, blames hackers
NATO summit invaded by wild peacocks
Kim Kardashian wins Nobel Peace Prize
"Panda protests for better bamboo rights.",
"Self-driving cars unionize and demand rights.",
North Korea offers peace for pizza rolls
"Cows form union for better field conditions.",
Swedish cows break world escape record
NASA reveals Saturn smells like Axe
Ukraine sells captured tanks on eBay
Stormy Daniels elected Mayor of Vegas
Germany mandates lederhosen in parliament Fridays
"Trump starts reality TV, declares presidency.",
Russia trades oil for Taylor Swift tickets
"Fake viral meme causes stock market to crash.",
Gaza ceasefire brokered by K-pop band
"Penguins spotted taking over Miami Beach.",
"Holographic pizza becomes the new currency.",
Wal-Mart recalls radioactive shrimp (again)
UN sanctions Belarus for bad vibes
Putin records EDM album for diplomacy
India launches “No Meetings Mondays” global treaty
Zelensky moonwalks into NATO press conference
Israel-Palestine truce signed on Minecraft server
Ukraine exports snowball weapons to Finland
Biden calls Merkel “Mom” in G20
Oprah buys Twitter, bans all politicians
China launches TikTok-controlled moon rover
Ukraine replaces tanks with trained bears
CDC recommends hugging goats for health
Jeff Bezos builds underwater Amazon city
Russian oligarch buys entire Swiss village
Netflix airs 24/7 Joe Rogan channel
"UFO claims diplomatic immunity from NASA.",
Tom Hanks becomes King of Canada
Israeli PM replaced by Shakira impersonator
"Ancient aliens leave SOS sign in New Mexico desert.",
World leaders compete in Mario Kart
North Korea bans color blue nationwide
Trump builds golden hotel on Moon
Iran discovers oil under Starbucks location
Israel elects AI chatbot as president
Ukraine trades Crimea for Black Sea resort
Zuckerberg unveils mind-reading Meta contacts
"Ghosts demand rent from haunted house owners.",
"Artificial sun created in basement in Texas."
Congress renames Tuesday “Freedom Ham Day”
Rudy Giuliani opens vampire-themed steakhouse
North Korea joins Paris Fashion Week
"Worldwide shortage of invisible ink causes chaos.",
Brazil builds jungle embassy in Antarctica
AI wins Pulitzer Prize for poetry
"Oreos declare independence from Nabisco.",
Kanye West opens church on Mars
"Vegans build vegan-only island, ban all burgers.",
"Clouds form funny shapes causing traffic jams.",
Beyoncé replaces Lincoln on penny design
Dwayne Johnson becomes head of NATO
"Fake moon landing footage accidentally aired again.",
Poland bans Excel after “data trauma”
Trump paints Mount Rushmore with Sharpie
Putin wins judo match against robot
Dennis Rodman negotiates alien peace treaty
Beyoncé buys entire island of Malta
"Weather app predicts daily weather based on mood.",
UN holds peace talks inside IKEA
Zelensky wins Nobel for sarcastic tweet
Trump claims Statue of Liberty is fake
"Secret underground city found inside Mount Everest.",
"Fake news creates a new country in Africa.",
"Aliens demand rights during UN meeting.",
"Bigfoot spotted grocery shopping in Ohio.",
Greta Thunberg powers Iceland with frowns
Supreme Court rules cats are citizens
Lady Gaga knighted by King Charles
Trump wears Crocs to UN Summit
Saudi Arabia unveils floating desert embassy
"Elon Musk announces AI pet dinosaur.",
